Beauty Grows from Yesterday's Debris
by Shari Skye
Summary: Garcia is depressed, Hotch tries to protect her. Their relationship changes, but maybe a bit too quickly for him to absorb. He's sure that he's the person that will never hurt her...
1. Chapter 1

******Disclaimer:** I do not own or in any way profit from Criminal Minds. If I did the story would proceed a bit differently. In fact, it may have proceeded as found below. :-)

**Notes:** This story will mess with the timeline a bit. It is an AU story. Because I thought the writers were a bit condescending when they wrote in the geeky Kevin as Penelope's boyfriend. Hello, have they heard that opposites attract? I hated the whole Kevin thing.

And how many of you thought that they had really blown it when they didn't develop something from the famous "Hotch Rocket" line? Or how about in Season 1 when she asked Hotch, "Who can say no to me?" and he smiled at her? You will find references in the story from the first two season's of CM, but it's all taking place much later. And I'm redoing the whole "Beth" relationship, because honestly, its just predictable and boring. Hotch needs some levity, and who could provide it better?

Anyway, I hope you enjoy. I have many chapters written already so this shouldn't be one that just falls short of finishing with no conclusion. *crosses fingers* (at least I hope.)

**Chapter 1**

She explained it once to Morgan after she was shot. "… _everything happens for a reason_… _if I lose faith in that then nothing in my life makes sense._"

She knew the reason she'd gone off the rails with hacking was so that she would be miraculously transported into this job with the bureau so that she could make a difference in the world. And probably she'd lost her parents to pave the way for that. She missed them, God but she missed them, but she knew that she wouldn't be there at the bureau today if they were still here. She could make sense out of a lot.

But life was making less and less sense every day. She was quirky, no one knew it better than she did. But she had this "goodness scale." She measured the good in people. Everyone had some goodness, everyone. And her adopted family all measured high on the scale, they were 8's and 9's, her Derek was definitely a 9. But one person was a 10. Aaron Hotchner. There was a man who never seemed to have a selfish thought. Oh he was impersonal, and serious, but she'd never seen him in a truly self indulgent moment. The rest of them all indulged themselves, including herself. But even the one thing that made him exceedingly happy (his son) was still all about his love for someone else.

She'd watched him over the years, struggling between being a family man and trying to save the world. She'd watched as his wife eventually gave up on him and became resentful. She'd watched as he'd cared for the team including herself. She'd watched him in the bomb incident in New York (over and over she'd watched it in fact), she'd seen him loose his friend there. She'd seen his demeanor after receiving his divorce papers. She'd seen him through the blinds crack an ever illusive smile as he watched his son on video. She'd seen him struggle with almost losing his hearing, and taking responsibility for things he couldn't possibly control. Then he was stabbed, and had to send the ex-wife that he still adored far away with his son. And that was almost more than she could bare to see.

Now Haley was dead and Hotch had seemed so broken and guilty; and she was unraveling. He masked it now of course. But, she couldn't find a reason for one very good man to suffer so much and so nothing in life made sense. Her downhill spiral started a year ago, she'd been on her monthly tour of the cemetery, leaving flowers on the neglected graves sites, because really, everyone should be remembered. And then she'd seen him. He was standing over Haley's grave and crying. She wanted to comfort him, but that wasn't her place, and she didn't feel that she should be witnessing such a personal moment. She turned and walked quickly away to the opposite side of the lot but not before seeing him mouth the same thing over and over, "I'm sorry." She'd leaned against a tree, slid down to the ground and sobbed.

The whole team had seen the fizz in her bubbly personality going flat. But she couldn't explain it to anyone. Derek would think it was some crush thing and laugh or try to fix it. She was quirky, everyone would try to find a rational type reason that this mattered so much, except Reid. He understood; his mind worked differently than the rest. He understood her need (even if he couldn't quite personalize it himself) to make sense of this. He'd taken on his little crusades as well and he got it. He'd encouraged her to find someone to talk to about it. She'd been scared, when the bureau found out that you were seeing someone professionally they started questioning your ability to do your job. But she was the wizard of the information highway so she'd suppressed their every avenue to find out that she was in therapy. That is all until hurricane Kevin.

The nosy little prick couldn't take the rejection when she'd stopped seeing him and was like her cyber-stalker. She hadn't realized of course since he wasn't keeping tabs on her merely by hacking into her computers. She'd squelched any information regarding her therapy so quickly she had no idea that he'd obtained anything about it. But he'd followed her of course and tapped into the database of the group of therapists in the office where she went once per week.

Knock, Knock, Knock. "Sir? Do you have a minute?" The slime had waited until she was out of the office and headed straight for the unit chief's office.

Aaron Hotchner raised his head to look at the man with the thick glasses and mismatched tie and shirt. "What can I do for you Mr. Lynch?"

Kevin slithered into the Special Agent's office. "Sir, I've come across some information that I think you should be aware of."

"I'm listening." Hotch could barely stand to look at this man for very long, unsure why. So he continued to peruse the information spread already across his desk.

"Well, it's about technical analyst Penelope Garcia." Kevin seemed to bounce back and forth from foot to foot as he said it.

Hotch put his head up then, "What about Garcia?"

"Well it's all right here Sir, I'll let you look at it for yourself." With that, he dropped a file on Hotch's desk and beat it toward the elevator.

Hotch picked up the fairly thin folder, and as he opened it Rossi walked in. "What did that little weasel want?"

"I'm just looking into it now." Rossi started to walk closer and Hotch snapped the folder shut. "What's on your mind Dave?"

"Oh, I sent you an email, it's an old case of mind, serial rapist up for parole. Take a look and give me your opinion."

"I'll get back to you by the end of the day." Hotch's eyes returned to his desk, longing to look back into the folder but unwilling to share the contents even with Rossi until he knew what it was.

"Ok then, I'll let you get back to your stack there." Rossi turned and walked out closing the door behind him.

Hotch opened the folder, not much was listed there. The name of a crisis counselor in DC, dates that Penelope Garcia had appointments with the counselor, and proof of payments for said appointments. Hotch knew that counseling obtained by bureau employees was to be reported, and this hadn't been, but he also knew that this didn't come through proper channels and that Lynch had probably obtained the information questionably.

Hotch made a few calls and knew that the marrow would see Lynch packing up and moving on. Then taking a deep breath, he thought about how to proceed from there. Closing his eyes he knew that he would have no other choice no matter how much he regretted it. He took a deep breath and dialed Garcia.

Her less than normally chipper voice came on the line, "Yes boss?"

"Garcia, when you have a moment I need you to stop by my office."

"Sure," she said with concern and then disconnected the line.

_CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM_

Knock, Knock. "You wanted to see me Sir?"

"Garcia please come in and close the door." Wanting to make this less of a reprimand for his obviously already distressed team member he motioned her over to the sofa and pulled a chair to the opposite side of the coffee table.

Feeling more than cautious, Garcia sat and remained silent.

Resting his elbows on his legs as he leaned forward, Hotch clasped his hands entwining his fingers and began to speak, "Penelope… it has been brought to my attention that you have sought help from a mental health professional." He tried to keep his voice as low and gentle as possible.

Her eyes raised to his for a moment and then lowered again immediately to the coffee table. "Yes Sir, I have." She knew she'd been caught, but how?

He could visibly see her withdraw and acknowledged that if it were physically possible she would shrink into the sofa and disappear. Wanting to be an encouragement, he rose from his chair and moved around the coffee table and sat on it facing her. He remained silent and picked up her hand from where it rested next to her on the sofa. Then he continued, "Penelope, if you felt you needed help to sort through some kind of crisis or even just feelings, there is nothing at all wrong with that, in fact it's admirable. But you are aware of the disclosure policy within the bureau."

She sat quietly saying nothing but did give an ever so slight nod.

"Penelope, fill out the form, as it should have been filled out, and put it at the bottom of my inbox. Do you understand?"

Recognition of his meaning dawned and she looked at him with tear-filled eyes and nodded.

"Since it is me that you turned the form in to, rather than your IT Supervisor, it is me that will be advised of your progress as it is monitored by a bureau psychologist."

She felt mortified, "Yes Sir."

"You will have to sign a release of information with your current counselor, but I will do my utmost to preserve and respect your privacy in this. I didn't set up these policies, and in some cases I am not sure that they are warranted. Unfortunately, that doesn't invalidate them." He tried to make eye contact, but he could see that she was unwilling to meet his imploring stare. "Penelope, this team is much more like a family than coworkers. You know if there is any way we can support you or help you, you need only ask."

"I know that," it was barely a whisper. She finally found some resolve in herself. "I'm not made that way." Her statement was clear, said with a little force, not a lot but a little.

"Penelope, do you know how much you matter to all of us here?" He wondered if there was a way to win this battle.

"Probably about the same as how much all of you matter to me. I'd do just about anything for any one of you, and I've let some of you help me before. But it's not in my nature to ask, it's not in your nature either. And even if it was, no one can help with this; I have to figure it out on my own." Tears began to slip down her cheeks then, and feeling helpless, he rubbed and patted the hand that he held between his own two.

His mind always moving fast where human interaction was involved, he read people the way that she read binary code. He thought of a way to change this dynamic. "It's not in my nature, that's true. But I'm in a position in my life where I need to make some changes. If I do need to ask for help, I hope you'll be among the ranks of who I might call."

Now he had her full attention, "Of course I would be. You know I'd do anything for you in a heartbeat."

He gave her one of his rare smiles as he leaned to the side to grab a few tissues for her. With the one hand still holding hers he rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. "I hoped you would be." Releasing her hand he stood as she mopped at the streaks on her face and gave her nose a slight blow. "Now, I'll let you get back to work and I'll work my way to the bottom of my inbox tomorrow." He looked at her making sure that she caught his meaning.

"I'll make sure that you complete all your pending reports Sir."

He was standing by door now ready to open it. He waited for her to finish wiping her tears. When she looked up at him, she still had a slight black smear by her eye. She was within arm's distance and he reached for her tissue, he reached up and wiped the smudge away, and then nodded.

She nodded then and he opened the door. "Thank you Garcia, I appreciate your help with this."

The way he covered for her was more than noble. "Anytime Sir, glad I could help." What she really meant was _Thank you so much for your help._ But she could see in his eyes that he knew that and it was an unspoken understanding between them.

Rather than helping her to right things though, all this did was further distort her world. He was the one who had suffered unspeakable tragedy, and he was the one to look after her and comforted her. Things couldn't be more out of balance in Penelope's universe.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

A week later Hotch was in his office meeting with one of the bureau shrinks. "Agent Hotchner, I've conferred with Ms. Garcia's analyst extensively. She is in a state of depression but I would consider it more as a crisis of belief."

"A crisis of belief?" He had been standing, but after Dr. Leland sat and began her assessment of Penelope's situation, he pulled out his desk chair and sat as well.

"We all live our lives by some philosophy, in your line of work Agent, you'll understand quickly what I'm saying. Ms. Garcia has experienced something in life to cause her to question her worldview."

Hotch leaned forward, resting a forefinger over his lips as he listened.

"As you know Agent Hotchner, we all cling to a set of beliefs about the world to help us make sense of it."

"Of course." He wore his usual stoic demeanor. "Is it this job that has Ms. Garcia bringing her beliefs into question?" He hated the thought of losing her and her amazing expertise, but he would suffer the loss if it was causing her such mental anguish.

"No, usually a crisis of belief is brought up by personal tragedy, but as you know Ms. Garcia has a large capacity for empathy. In her particular case, she is witnessing someone else experience tragedy. I can tell you that I see nothing empirically wrong with Ms. Garcia's worldview, she believes in fact as most of us do. Number 1, that when tragedy strikes, something good can come from it. And number 2, that people generally receive a measure of what they contribute to the world. Some people call it Karma, for others they just say that what goes around comes around. Bible believers say that a person reaps what they sow. But for Ms. Garcia, that is coming into question because this person in her life she has placed on a pedestal. From what her therapist shares, this person rises above every other person in life on her…" and at this point Dr. Leland raised her hands to make quotations signs in the air, " 'goodness scale.' She can't find a reason or a upside to the tragedy that this person has experienced and because of that person's level of goodness their amount of tragedy is completely unwarranted. This brings her crisis of belief, and along with it a bit of depression. For Ms. Garcia, life isn't making sense. She is doing all that she can however to work this out. I have spoken with Ms. Garcia personally, she seems no danger to herself or others and other than seeming quite subdued for her usual self, which I surmised from her colorful office décor. She is perfectly capable of doing her job here at the bureau, perhaps with a little less exuberance than you are used to."

"I see, in your opinion is there anything that the people who are close to her can do to help restore her faith or worldview?" he questioned.

"Agent Hotchner, I have shared as much as I possibly can, and while I am not personally in possession of the details of her circle of friends or their experiences, you may very well be. I am not comfortable sharing more in case it compromises Ms. Garcia's therapy or personal boundaries. As I previously stated, she is competent to do her job. I will however monitor her progress and let you know if there is reason for concern or if the therapy situation is resolved."

"Thank you." He looked down at his desk as though the meeting were at an end, however the doctor in his office had something else on her mind.

"Agent Hotchner, while I'm here I would like to ask about your grief counseling."

He looked up and leaned back in his chair, "Ok."

The doctor seemed the tiniest bit irritated that he wasn't more forthcoming with information. She prompted with a question, "Are you still involved with grief counseling Agent Hotchner?"

"No I am not." His expression had often looked the same as now but never more serious.

"And when did that stop Agent Hotchner?" She was writing something in a notebook.

"Dr. Leland, I submitted my information through the proper channels on that, I'm sure that your file reflects that I stopped attending the group meetings three months ago."

"And you feel that 10 months of therapy was sufficient?"

"Yes ma'am I do. I loved my ex-wife, but we were divorced. And while I will always feel a certain amount of responsibility for her death, what happened was not my fault. In fact I did everything possible to protect my family, and if it were happening right now I am not sure if there is anything I could do differently. What I can do, is make people safer, and the way I do that by doing my job."

He had stood while he spoke and was looking out the window of his office. The petite psychologist stood as well. "Thank you Agent Hotchner, I am sorry if I seemed… well, abrasive. We all have our tactics for obtaining the information that we need."

He turned to look at her and nodded.

"You've come to some conclusions that it takes a lot of us twice as long to reach, I'm glad you've adjusted so well in the last 13 months. Thank you for your time today." She reached her hand out.

He muttered his thanks, shook her hand and she exited. No longer had she walked out the door than Morgan was standing in the open door knocking on it. "Hotch, everything ok?"

"Everything is fine Morgan. Did you need something?"

"No… no man, I was just checkin." He turned to leave but Hotch stopped him.

"Morgan, is everything ok with you?"

Morgan looked concerned. "Why would you ask that?"

"I just wondered if you had experienced some kind of personal loss lately."

"No, where would you get that idea?"

"It was just a question Morgan, could you please not mention that I asked?"

Morgan had moved farther into the office. "Are you going to tell me what this is about?"

"No Morgan I'm not. It's not important. But I would rather that this stayed between us."

"Whatever you say man."

"Thank you Morgan."

And with that Morgan turned and left, closing the door behind him.

Hotch turned and looked out the window toward the bullpen again, _It must be someone from the 'families of murder victims' that she counsels_.


	3. Chapter 3

**Please don't be afraid to review. I can take good and bad criticism. Let me know what you think. :-)**

**Chapter 3**

Of course, he knew she had a great capacity for empathy. He'd seen it. When she'd spoken to the boy in the gothic attire on the teen choking case, and when the little girl had been abducted he saw her consoling the mother. She had an ability for establishing a rapport with people extremely quickly. It's the reason why he had started bringing her along on many of the cases they'd worked. When no one was able to establish a comfortable communication with certain personality types, Penelope was his go to person. He had thought it would be good for the team as well, to have her bright personality with them more often, but by then she had already had settled into her subdued attitude. He tried to think back, she'd been this way for a while now. When had it begun?

He let his computer work while he leaned back and closed his eyes in concentration.

"You have a headache Daddy?" his young son asked.

He sat back up in his chair and looked at Jack, "No buddy," his tussled the boy's hair, "just thinking. You ready for bed?"

"I brushed my teeth." Jack smiled big for his dad to look at his teeth.

Hotch smiled. Smiles were rare but he had them in plenty for Jack. "Good job son, you want me to read you a story?"

"No, I promised Jake (his teddy bear) I would read to him tonight. But can I have a hug?"

"Of course you can," wrapping his arms around the boy, "I love you so much Jack."

"I love you too Daddy, good night." Jack smiled up at his dad, unknowingly causing a lump in his father's throat.

"Good night Jack."

Jack ran off to his room and Hotch looked at the computer screen. It was still working so Hotch leaned his head back again and closed his eyes, returning to his previous train of thought. _When did her mood turn so glum?_ He couldn't quite put his finger on it. She'd been this way for a while now. He remembered when she wasn't this way. He remembered her smile, her soft heart, her crazy clothes and pink striped hair and smiled. He'd not seen that in a while now.

_When did it stop? _He thought if he could just put his finger on it, perhaps he could figure out how to make this better. _Why is this so important?_ Because, the whole team is less of themselves without her exuberance. There had been less of the flirting with Morgan, less of her little gifts or special treats when they returned from a case. Her outfits were also less loud and cheery and after a brief spell of red, her hair had returned to blonde and almost conservative hairstyles. It was just plain wrong.

As he thought, he couldn't think of one instance of happy, carefree Penelope since he'd returned to leading the BAU. His expression became twice as serious as he sat straight up in his seat, recalling what Dr. Leland had said…

**_…_ _Ms. Garcia has a large capacity for empathy. In her particular case, she is witnessing someone else experience tragedy…, __this person rises above every other person in life on her 'goodness scale.' She can't find a reason or a upside to the tragedy that this person has experienced and because of that person's level of goodness their amount of tragedy is completely unwarranted._**

_Could I be that person?_ It was incredible.

**_… this person rises above every other person in life on her 'goodness scale.'_**

It couldn't be him. He was serious to the point of crabby with Garcia half the time. He really regretted that now. He hadn't meant to seem that way, he knew he'd gone out of his way to let her know she was appreciated though. That much he was thankful for.

**_… because of that person's level of goodness their amount of tragedy is completely unwarranted._**

He knew in his heart it was him, but it was hard to believe. How long had it been since he'd achieved that kind of esteem in anyone's perception of him. It had been a long time. Haley had admired him in the beginning. But she couldn't reconcile herself with the man that he'd grown into. The one with so much responsibility that it sometimes physically hurt. And rather than supporting him through that and lightening his burden, she'd rebelled against it and rejected him. He couldn't change, even though he'd loved her. How could he change himself when he saw what he saw every day, when he knew he could make some kind of difference.

**_This brings her crisis of belief, and along with it a bit of depression._**

She had literally shared in his pain. He couldn't remember the last time that had happened. Or could he?

**_"Garcia? Where is the stack of cases that were on my desk waiting for reports?"_**

**_"Oh, I filled them out for you sir, based on the events of the cases… Here, look them over. I can redo anything that isn't right, if they are ok, you can sign off and you're all done."_**

He remembered how shocked he'd been, and grateful. That was right after New York he'd returned with the injured ear drum and had frequent headaches. She'd looked at him with such concern, but he'd hardly been in a place to notice, not until now.

Then after he'd returned from the next case, and he'd had to drive back still because of the ear, he'd found a tin of cookies on his desk. They'd been homemade, the best snicker doodles he could remember tasting. No one had owned up to putting them there, but then he hadn't asked Penelope.

When he'd returned to his apartment after being stabbed, it was strangely and amazingly clean. No blood stain on the floor as he'd expected. His refrigerator had been stocked up. He knew it had been empty before. That time he'd known she was the culprit. The contents had closely resembled her "rabbit food." But there had been a few containers of homemade soup in the freezer which had been a godsend for how he'd felt at the time.

**_"Garcia? Did you stock my refrigerator?" _**

**_"Yes Sir, I hope you don't mind, we all stopped by to clean, but I thought you'd need some food. The refrigerator was completely empty. And I know what it's like to live alone and be recovering from an injury. There are some soups in the freezer, they should be easy to just microwave or heat on the stove. It can be difficult to hold food down the first week after surgery."_**

He recalled the way she babbled. Even now it made him smile. He'd thanked her and even left a thank you card when he'd returned to work. But her bubbly voice on the phone that day had helped to restore his hope in the world.

Jumping forward he recalled the last year since he'd been back after Haley. When not on cases lunch had spontaneously appeared each time he'd attempted to 'forget.' She'd sent computer games home with him for Jack. There had been chocolate chip cookies on occasion. They were Jack's favorite. She had even pinched hit as a babysitter when she hadn't gone on cases with the team and his sister in law had been unavailable.

Now that he knew the source of her crisis, he was sure he could do something to right this. He craved to have the team back up to its usual 150%. And he knew that Penelope was the heart of that balance.

He finally opened his eyes to an error on his computer screen. _This can't be good._ The DVD he had been creating for Jack with all the home videos of Haley hadn't completed writing. He tried to play it and it couldn't be read. Oh well, he'd make another. He removed damaged disk, trashed it and put a fresh one inside. This time the program couldn't read the original files to write another. _What? This can't be right. _He tried again, but to no avail. He went back to the original files which he'd had on an SD card. But now his computer wasn't reading those files either. _Shit!_

He checked his watch. 8:30 p.m. on a Friday night. Would she be home? A little more than a year ago, she probably wouldn't be. Now? He knew she probably would be. He felt guilty to ask, but he had to have this back for Jack's sake. Hesitantly he reached for his phone, brought up her number, and hit 'send.'

"Boss Man?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

When he let her into the apartment, she'd been carrying two laptops in bags with a string of accessories and one of her large purses.

"I know this sounds careless Penelope, but every copy of every video of Haley with Jack is in that computer. If there is any way at all to rescue those… Please, please do it."

Her look was so full of sympathy it made him groan on the inside that he'd caused her further concern on his part. "Of course Sir," she turned and set up her computers before turning to his.

"Uh Sir?"

"Yeah?" He was hovering eager to help in whatever way he could.

"There's a fifty in the front pocket of my purse. I had just ordered Chinese when you called. I called them back and asked them to deliver it here."

"You haven't eaten yet?" God now he did feel guilty.

"No," she was typing away. "My families of murder victims group went a little long tonight. It kind of … deters your appetite if you know what I mean. But a hot shower magically rinses away some of the yuk, and then I was starving."

That explained the damp ponytail and faint smell of strawberry soap. "I wasn't sure you'd still be doing counseling work with how you'd been feeling lately." He was profiling her and he knew it but couldn't help it. She was possibly the most selfless person he knew. She wasn't perfect and had a bit of a rebel in her, but her heart was filled to the brim with kindness and compassion.

"If I ever acquire a family of my own to care for, I will probably stop. But if that never happens then I won't ever stop. It helps me cope with what we see every day."

He gently placed a hand on her shoulder, "I'm sure you provide a great source of comfort for them Penelope."

"I try Sir."

"Penelope, each time you call me 'Sir' I feel like an additional year has been added to my age. Please tell me that is not your intention."

"Oh my God no," she reached up to her shoulder and touched his hand, "my Liege, I will correct that I promise." Her hand then slipped back to the keyboard. Then she sighed in frustration, removed the SD card from his computer, and plugged it into her laptop.

There was a knock on the door and Hotch went to retrieve the food. She wasn't paying attention to the fact that he still carefully examined the delivery man through the peep hole. Or that he paid for the food himself, along with giving a generous tip. He put the food on the table, went to retrieve a plate and poor a couple of glasses of wine.

"Wallah!" she was so glad that the SD card wasn't fully corrupted. They could become pretty temperamental at times when programs that used the files had an error, but she had an independent card reader that could usually retrieve any file from one.

"You got it?" When she shook her head and smiled while still hammering away at her keyboard, "Oh my God I love you!"

She looked up at him then, she'd never heard him say anything remotely like that. She was startled and it showed.

He put his head down and smiled, and then they both burst into laughter. He handed her a glass of chardonnay and set some serving spoons on the table next to the cartons of food.

"Have you eaten?" she asked, still typing.

"I have, Jack picked dinner. We had macaroni and cheese." The slight grimace and roll of his eyes said it all.

"Not your favorite huh? Were you planning to put all these videos on a single CD or file?"

"Yes I was, and no it's not my favorite."

"Most men I know flip over macaroni and cheese."

He watched her pull out the SD card out and inserted another. "I always loved the homemade version, I just have no idea how to make it. Jack seems to be happy with the boxed stuff, I guess most kids are."

"Well now I understand your aversion to it," she smiled. "I only eat the homemade stuff too." She gave the keyboard one final hard tap and looked up at him. "Go get another plate and let's eat."

The smell of the food actually had his mouth watering, and it seemed there was enough. "Are you sure? I don't want to short change you here."

"Oh please, you see this spread right?" Noticing that he wasn't moving she went to the kitchen herself to grab the plate. "The thought was to curl up on the couch, wear my furry slippers and some comfy jammies and spend the weekend watching old movies. And with all this, I wouldn't have to cook, just microwave." She was wearing a guilty grin.

"Well, I might be able to supply the old movie." He nodded toward the computer. "I'm assuming your writing another DVD, those take a little bit."

She knew that her computer didn't take long but she wanted to make more than one copy for him. They dished out plates of food and moved to the sofa to watch the movie as they ate.

They were watching "Topper Returns" and laughing so hard at Eddie Anderson each time the ghost appeared. Ok so it was the ghost of a murder victim, but it was light and funny and they were really enjoying it. Hotch of course had always loved the old movie but Penelope had never seen it before. Watching her laugh was definitely good for anyone's soul. He found himself enjoying the evening more than any could remember in a very long time.

"Smiles look good on you Hotch, you should wear them more often." She didn't look at him as she said it. She wasn't used to not calling him 'Sir' and even though she'd watched Jack here a few times they had NEVER spent any relaxed time together EVER.

"Well I am trying, but I have to say, smiles look much better on you and they've been very scarce lately."

"I know, I'm sorry, I'll work on that."

And then his interrogation skills came into play. "We all had been wondering if you'd just been harboring a broken heart."

"Well in a way, oh…. You mean Kevin? Oh God no!" She looked completely aghast.

Hotch couldn't help but snort into his wine glass.

"Did you know he left the bureau last week?" she asked.

"I did." Once again his serious mask was back.

"He blames me."

Hotch turned to her still serious, "How do you know?"

"He sent me a pretty nasty email."

"Penelope, I don't want to seem intrusive, but why did you and Kevin break up?" He was still wearing the stoic mask.

"You mean besides the clinginess, bossiness, and general creepiness that began to emerge?"

Hotch's expression didn't budge nor did he speak.

"Well, he had a couple of habits that I couldn't tolerate."

"Which were?"

"Uhg… he ate bacon on maple bars, you know… smooshed into the maple frosting? And…"

"And?"

"His favorite movie was '8 Heads in a Duffle Bag' and after Terlingua, I just couldn't take it anymore and gave him the boot."

She looked so disillusioned but Hotch couldn't help but burst into laughter. She tried to keep looking appalled but she enjoyed seeing him laugh so much, she couldn't help but join in.

Once the laughter died down however, he began to question her again. "Seriously, what did he say in the email Penelope?"

"Oh," she was stunned by his sudden change in mood. "He said that he knew I got him fired, he had no idea that I had people so wrapped around my little finger, and that he wouldn't forget it."

"Forward me that email." It was a command, and she knew it. But his mind was beginning to race. He'd seen this kind of scenario more times than he'd like. "Actually…" He stood up feeling agitated.

"What? What is it?"

He turned to her, "How much of your BAU magic can you work from these laptops?"

"Most of it, just a little slower. Why?"

"Can you track the location of Kevin's cell phone right now?"

Oh this is ridiculous, Kevin was a pain in the ass but he wasn't dangerous. "Oh come on, that's not really necessary, he's just a computer geek."

"Indulge me." He tried to soften his request.

It worked of course, she nodded and went to her computers. The one was just finishing up the last of the videos, she sat down at the other and began typing away. First, she accessed the FBI resources, then punched in the phone number and waited for the GPS co-ordinance to appear. "My God!"

"What is it?" He was looking over her shoulder in an instant.

"He's outside." She was completely stunned.

Hotch tried to think this through. He was more than a bit cautious since Foyet's appearance in this very apartment, and now Jack was here. If he went outside and there was a problem… He couldn't let Penelope go out, and if he called the local LEO's this situation would just continue.

"Penelope, the information about your seeing a mental health professional came through Kevin, how might he have obtained that information?"

Now she really looked aghast. "There's only one way, he's been physically following me. There is no parking spot there, I usually have to walk two blocks to reach the office. And I have been keeping the cyber "buzz" regarding … err… maintained." Her eyes lowered at that part.

"I thought as much." He went to the closet, retrieved his side arm and clipped it to him and put one of his suit jackets on to conceal it.

"What are you doing?" She was almost in a panic. "YOU can't go out there."

"I have to, this needs to stop."

"We'll call 911 but don't go out there." She was clutching at his arm.

His response was calm and meant to reassure her. "Penelope if we call the locals it will be dismissed as unimportant. He'll make up an excuse for being there and nothing will come of it."

"Well maybe it's really nothing." She wanted to hope that was true but she knew better.

"This may not be as bad as I suspect, just sit tight but turn the security alarm on after I leave ok? I'll call you," he said picking up his phone and holding it up, "when I'm coming back up."

"Ok."

She couldn't help but stare out the window, but she didn't see Hotch come out of the building. She could however see Kevin's car parked along the street. He was down just in front of the building a bit, same side of the street so that he could watch the entrance of the building. Then she saw Hotch. He must have exited the building through a back or side entrance. He was standing behind Kevin's car watching him.

Hotch could see an open laptop in the car, the screen showed Penelope staring out the window. He could now see Kevin holding a digital camera with a high-powered zoom lens on it. Hotch stepped back into the shadows and called her. "Step back from the window," he whispered after she picked up. Hotch tried to see if she'd complied but his gaze was focused on the car. He saw Kevin drop the camera and exit the car.

When Kevin saw her stare out the window, answer her phone and move away he knew he'd been spotted. _Damn, I'm not going down for this, he's the one that stole my goddamned girlfriend. _Kevin grabbed the tire iron off his floorboard and got out of the car scouring the shadows of the dark street. _There's the bastard._ He spotted Hotch and lurched for him.

Hotch saw Kevin coming for him with tire-iron held high and drew his firearm. "Stop right there Lynch. Think about what you're doing." Hotch with his left hand punched the emergency number programmed to a single key on his phone. "I'm a federal agent, and you're stalking and brandishing a weapon."

"Well I was with the bureau too you jack-ass. I gave you pertinent information and it got me canned, how does that work?" He was still gaining on Hotch ever so slightly.

"Kevin, you're still moving toward me. You need to stop, you know as well as I do how these things end." Hotch kept his gun trained on Kevin.

Kevin halted his step. "What's she doing with you up there huh? You think I don't know how she worships you? I just thought it was a stupid one way crush, but you aren't so great are you? You'll take what's on offer same as any guy."

_Whoa! This guy is a wreck, how did he ever pass his psych eval when he was hired?_ "Lynch you're way out of line here. Think about your own future, you really want to give up everything over a broken heart?"

"Broken heart? You think I'm broken hearted over that bitch?" his look turned even more sinister. "Here's the thing though, she's mine. NOT yours. MINE!"

They both heard the siren then. "Kevin, that would be the local authorities. You don't want to still be in that threatening stance when they arrive do you?"

This seemed to make an impact and Kevin lowered the tire iron. The police car pulled to a stop in the street and the officers exited. They didn't spot Hotch right away so he had a chance to raise his credentials with his left hand and step out toward them, his gun still trained on Lynch with his right hand.

"I'm Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner with the FBI. This is former Technical Analyst Kevin Lynch. He's stalking another analyst who is down the street. I'm going to lower my weapon now."

As he lowered his weapon and the LEO approached. Kevin lurched at Hotch once again with tire iron held high and a shot rang out. The LEO still standing by the car shot Kevin and Hotch watched him fall as if it was in slow motion. _Damn! _This was all the emotionally fragile woman needed to happen.

It would take a while to answer all of their questions; he called her in the mean time.

"What happened? I heard a shot." She was frantic.

"Please stay there with Jack, local law enforcement is here, I'll be up in a few minutes to explain."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm fine Penelope, I'll be there soon."

He hung up and went over the scenario with the officers. They wanted a statement from Penelope but he'd used his own persuasion to put that off until tomorrow. He didn't want Jack disturbed if he hadn't already been. It also helped that he hadn't been the one to deliver the shot. He did feel bad though, it was a fatal wound and the EMT's on the scene could do little more than zip Kevin's lifeless body up in black.

In one way he hated to see it happen, yet in another … for the sake of Penelope's safety, he was glad to see this at an end. These cases could go on for years and the object of an offender's obsession usually had ended up with scars to show for it, sometimes physical but always emotional scars.

Twenty-five minutes later, he rang her phone to indicate that he was coming back up. He hadn't brought his keys out with him so he knocked slightly on the door. After verifying it was him through the peephole, she opened the door and let him in.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for the reviews. It felt good to get rid of Kevin lol. He's always given me the creeps and the show writers didn't even write him as creepy as I did. haha! **

**Hope you all love this chapter as well. :-)**

**Chapter 5**

Hotch sighed and ran his hand over his face, dreading to make this disclosure.

"Oh my God, you look like hell. Here sit down."

"Let me get a drink first," he walked to the tray on the counter with whiskey and tumblers. Pouring some, taking a drink, and then walking back toward her.

"Is he hurt? Did they take him to the hospital? Did you shoot him?" Her mind was going a mile a minute.

"Penelope, sit down please." He indicated the couch and sat down next to her sitting his drink on the coffee table near the half-filled glass of wine he'd left earlier.

Once she sat he continued, "Penelope, he was watching the window and building entrance through a high-powered lens and recording your movements on his computer."

The look on her face was enough to tell him that she was in complete shock.

"When you looked out the window and then stepped back he realized he'd been made and got out of the car looking for me. I speed dialed the locals and tried to talk him down, but he had a tire iron in his hand and intended to use it."

His explanation was interrupted by her gasp.

"I had him pretty much talked down when the LEO's arrived but when I lowered my weapon he lunged at me, and one of the officer's shot him."

She took her hand away from her mouth. "Well I thought he was creepy but that's just… I hope his fast typing hand is impaired."

"Penelope, it was dark out there, the officers had to act fast, it's not that easy to draw your weapon on the fly and make the discerning shot in the dark." God he hated making this explanation.

"What are you saying?" She was scared to death and he could see it.

He took a deep breath in preparation for his next statement. "It was a fatal shot Penelope."

"Oh God!" She covered her face with her hands and began to cry. "Why would he do that?"

He was glad for Jack's sake that she wasn't one of those loud criers. She sat there so silently, shoulders shaking with her sobs and it completely broke his heart. He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around her. "Would you like me to call someone? JJ or Morgan?"

She sniffed a few times. "JJ is on vacation with Will and Henry, and Morgan's mom is visiting to meet his new girlfriend."

"You're right, but I'm sure Morgan would want to be here for you even with that."

"No its ok, I'll be fine. I should go." She started to stand but her legs were like jell-o and started to buckle.

He was already starting to stand to stay her from bolting, so when she began to topple he caught her sitting them both back down. "You need to sit for a while, take several deep breaths."

She wasn't crying now but just shaking and breathing rapidly. He let her lean into him and he rubbed circles on her back trying to calm her and encourage her to slow breathing so that she didn't hyperventilate. "Come on, deep breaths, there you go, that's better."

"My head hurts so bad," she finally rasped out.

Letting go of her he went to the kitchen, he returned with a couple of aspirin and a glass of the same whiskey he'd just poured for himself.

"Oh no, I can barely drink wine."

"Well tonight's a special case, slam it back then wash it down with some of the wine. It will help with the headache and help you to relax," he said as he sat back down next to her.

Unable to speak she nodded and did as he said. She popped the aspirins into her mouth, slammed the whiskey back and then reached for her wine glass. She sloshed the wine around in her mouth for a second and then sat back. The whiskey began to take affect fairly quickly. She took a couple of deep breaths and he could see her visibly relax. "This seems so surreal."

He leaned his head back as well, closing his eyes. "I know that feeling."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry that you had to be involved in this."

"I'm not." He picked his head up and looked at her.

She looked up at him questioningly. "Penelope I hate to think what he might have done if he'd caught you alone with the amount of rage he displayed tonight."

"Was he really that far gone?"

"Yes he was. He was very far gone."

"I was in a relationship with him, oh… I just feel so … oh … I don't even know. Sickened I guess." She sat up, "Oh thank God he didn't hurt you!" The wine she had consumed earlier and the whiskey she'd just knocked back were certainly making her sluggish but the headache was hanging on. She began to massage her temples and forehead.

"Try taking your ponytail out."

"Oh right." She reached up behind her head to remove the elastic band holding her hair, but her coordination was fading and she got it caught in her hair "Ouch!"

"Here, let me help." She had leaned forward and was massaging her temples again. He carefully pulled the tangled hair that was trapping the elastic band. When it was free he reached in an massaged her scalp a bit. He could see her shoulders slump and her breathing slow more. "Better?"

"Yes."

Too tired to be aware of her actions she leaned back against him and he wrapped his arms around her once more. He meant to give her a few minutes and then maybe to offer his room while he took the couch, but while he waited it out, the alcohol consumed him too and he drifted into sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

He woke to the faint sound of cartoons playing on the TV. His head was resting on the armrest of the sofa, one arm around Garcia as her head rested on his shoulder. She was still sound asleep. Jack had obviously moved the glasses and plates off of the coffee table and was sitting on it Indian style watching his favorite Saturday morning cartoons.

Jack noticed the difference in the sound of breathing and turned around to look at his father. "Morning Daddy," he said quietly.

"Morning buddy," Hotch whispered back.

"Did Miss Penny spend the night?"

"Yeah Jack, she came to help me with some computer things last night, but she was really sad so I didn't want her to drive home."

"Is she gonna be ok Daddy?"

"I think so buddy, in time. It might just take a while, like for you and me. Lucky for me though, I had you." Hotch smiled at his son.

"And I had you," Jack smiled back and then turned around to face his cartoons again. "Daddy? Can we go to Ihop?"

"I think that might be a good idea Jack. Would you mind if Miss Penny came with us? I think spending some time with you might make her feel better."

"She likes the rooty tooty pancakes," he told his father as he watched the TV.

"How do you know that Jack?" Hotch questioned.

"Remember when Aunt Jess was away at that auction and you were still on the plane?"

"Yes I do, I didn't get home till later afternoon that Saturday."

"Miss Penny took me to Ihop. That's how come it's my favort."

"Oh I see." Hotch was still whispering. "Well why don't you go get dressed and I'll wake Miss Penny up ok?"

"Ok Daddy." With that Jack scrambled off of the coffee table and ran to his room.

To be truthful Hotch really wanted to wake her so that he could stretch. Now that he was awake he realized how much he ached from not only sleeping on the too small couch but sharing it. And his arm was asleep. "Penelope," he spoke softly into her hair, "Penelope, time to wake up."

"Mhmm," was her only response and her body tensed for a moment and then relaxed again.

This was as physically close as he'd been to anyone except Jack in over a year. It felt strange and yet kind of good to feel her body stretched alongside his own and feel the light squeeze of her arm around his torso as she'd momentarily tensed. His neck and shoulders were still aching however so he made another stab at waking her. "Penelope," he spoke louder this time and also shook her a bit with his free arm. "Penelope, wake up sleepy head."

She squeezed him again as she stirred and he reveled in the feel of that. Suddenly he felt her body freeze. She was coming to and trying to recognize her surroundings. She'd slept with her glasses on, so a hand came up to set them straight as she lifted her head slightly to look around. As realization set in she looked up at Hotch and then scrambled to get up which only landed her on the floor. He was only quick enough to reach his hand behind her head to keep her from hitting her head on the table edge. "Ouch!"

"Oh!" Realizing now that she'd hurt his hand, this was becoming increasingly embarrassing. How in the world did she manage to wake up half sleeping on top of her boss on his couch? "Oh my God, are you ok?"

His hand smarted a bit but he was laughing. "I'm fine. You know I don't think I'm really that scary in the morning."

"No of course not," she was breathless, "I was just surprised, I … I don't remember falling asleep."

He sat up and offered her a hand to get up off the floor. "Well I don't either," he looked back toward the table, "We left your computers running."

"Oh my gosh," she hurried over to the table. "Well the good news is that your DVD's are complete."

He stood then watching her. "There is more than one?"

"Uhm, yeah." She tried to get her bearings. "Of course, Mon Ami. I have 3 DVD's and 3 SD cards. You hold onto one card, one DVD for Jack. The other copies are for your personal safe and your safety deposit box. That way you don't have to panic again." She held up all her offerings.

"Garcia what would we ever do without you?" he smiled.

"Miss Penny!" Jack came running to her, arms wrapping around her legs.

"Hi Jack! How have you been? You look like you've grown," she picked him up and hugged him.

"I haven't seen you in a while, how come you don't come to say 'hi' sometimes?"

"Oh… I'm sorry sweetie, I guess I've been a bit wrapped up in stuff lately. That was careless of me, I'll try to keep in touch better." She set him down then.

"Daddy says we can all go to Ihop. I know you like the rooty tooty pancakes."

"Oh, thank you Jack. But I think you and your Daddy need to have a men's breakfast and I should go home." She knew that Hotch was just trying to be nice. Yet the thought of going home and spending the day crying after all that had happened didn't appeal either.

Jack looked at his dad dejectedly, "Dad, you said she'd come."

Hotch looked at Penelope, "He's right, I said you would come with us. He's really looking forward to it." It wasn't fair to play that card but he felt he had to. Letting her go home alone right now was unthinkable, not to mention unappealing to him. Jack had a special party day planned with a friend and then Hotch would be alone for the rest of the day. Besides, he knew that Penelope would have to make a statement and it would be better if he took her.

"I don't have a toothbrush," she felt a bit self-conscious already.

Jack piped up. "I have a new one that the dentist gave me last time. I didn't use it though cuz daddy got me a lectric one of Spiderman."

Penelope couldn't help but smile, this kid really was adorable. "Well anything will do at this point Jack, lead the way."

Hotch crossed his arms and smirked. His son really was something. He was pretty sure only Jack could have gotten the stubborn blonde to change her mind just then. He could hear them talking in the bathroom.

"Wow that's a really small toothbrush," she exclaimed.

"Yeah prolly cuz us kids have small mouths."

"Yeah that's probably why."

"What kind of toothpaste do you want? Daddy uses this one but it burns my mouth, I have bubble gum flavor. You want to try it?"

"Bubble gum flavor?"

"Yeah, it's really good."

"Well I think I'd probably rather have your daddy's kind."

"Oh come on, try mine, you'll like it I promise."

She giggled, "Ok, hand it over."

Hotch went into his room to change clothes, he closed the door but was still listening to the exchange and he was still smiling.

"It's yummy isn't it?"

"Oh it sure is Jack, it's the best." Secretly she was just waiting to be left alone so she could make use of the mouthwash on the counter.

"Hey Jack, would you mind if I had a moment alone in the bathroom?"

"Oh," the boy reddened understanding at once. "Sure, I needa put my shoes on anyway," he said scurrying out.

The kid was perceptive she'd give him that. Not only did she want to use that mouthwash, but her bladder was also bursting. Oh, which meant she needed to hurry, Hotch most certainly was waiting on the bathroom too. She finished up in the bathroom quickly and then went back out to her giant purse and grabbed her brush to make some kind of sense out of her hair. _Where is my hair band? I thought I'd had a ponytail in._ And then the recollection came to her, trying to remove the band from her hair, Hotch helping, and then massaging her scalp and running is fingers through her hair.

_Ok, that memory is just weird. _Although, it was no less weird than waking up half-sprawled over her boss. _Sheesh Garcie, you are out of control girlfriend!_

After her hair was pulled up into another ponytail, and her laptops were bagged up she sat down on the sofa with Jack who was once again watching cartoons. Which is when Hotch came back in looking magnificent she thought in jeans, white sneakers, and a long sleeve navy polo shirt. _Get a grip on yourself right now Garcie!_

When they got out to the car, Hotch was buckling his son into the backseat and noticed Penelope frozen and staring at the yellow tape down the street. There was a large blood stain on the sidewalk. Her mouth was gaping open and he knew he would have to break her away from the sight before her.

"Daddy you remember I'm goin to Chad's to the jumping party today right?"

"Yeah buddy, I remember, 11:30 right?" he clicked Jack's seatbelt and closed the door.

Penelope had unknowingly started walking toward the partitioned off area. Hotch walked up to her, "Penolope?" She seemed almost in a trance. "Penelope, let's get in the car ok?" He gently put his hands on her upper arms and turned her back toward the car.

Once they were at the door of the car she seemed to snap out of it. "I'm sorry," she was all she could say.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," he opened the door for her and closed it once she was seated.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Breakfast passed in a flurry of silliness and giggling, and when they were done they stopped by the hobby shop to pick up a wooden Tonka models which had chunky parts and large screws with which to put things together. Jack was small but loved putting things together.

"Daddy where did Miss Penny go?"

Hotch looked around, "Good question buddy, pick out your model and we'll go look for her."

"Look at this one Daddy, it has a work bench and a little truck that sits on it. I like this one, do you?"

"I like it very much Jack, are you sure that's the one you want?"

"I'm sure."

"Ok, let's go find Miss Penny."

They found her with the yarns, picking up some uniquely designed furry looking yarns to make a new poncho sweater. "There you are Miss Penny, we been lookin for you."

"Oh I'm sorry Jack, when I get in this store I get a little crazy. Will you forgive me? Anyway, I thought you and your dad might want to pick out models on your own." She bent down and whispered, "You know… it's kind of a guy thing."

It was sweet how she kept wanting to bow out so he would spend time with his son, but Hotch felt bad that she should think she was such an intrusion. When Jack had addressed her this morning he'd been acutely aware that he'd used her for babysitting and ignored the fact that his son had formed a bond with the colorful blonde. Obviously Jack had missed her and she him.

"Aunt Penny, do you ever pick out boy colors?"

She giggled at that. "Well not usually Jack why?"

"Cuz you could make me a scarf or something, but I can't wear stuff that color," he said pointing at the colorful bouquet of yarn in her arm.

"No? Well since I'm not a boy I probably need you to show me the boy colors."

"Ok, this way," and in his dad's serious expression he turned and lead her toward the far end of the yarns.

She looked at Hotch who was once again smiling. She'd never seen her boss smile so much. She was realizing that he was far more adjusted than she had given him credit for. She'd been experiencing more depression than he had. She smiled back and they followed Jack to subdued colors. What he picked out actually impressed Penelope. It was a blend of black, charcoal, and red. "This one would go with my Spiderman jacket."

"Oh you're right it would," she was down on her knees next to him inspecting the skein of yarn. "And I bet I could put a cool web design at the ends for you."

"Cool," he simply said.

Hotch was rather impressed with the exchange. His son who was always so shy with people, even people he knew was displaying nothing of that with the colorful Penelope. "Ok you guys, you have everything? We have 20 minutes to get you Jack to your jump party to meet your friend."

They purchased their goods and then drove Jack to his friend's house. It was just a few miles away. The house had a large backyard and they had three large bouncy houses inflated. Jack could hardly contain his excitement. "What's the occasion for this?" Penelope whispered.

Hotch gave a slight eye roll, "They just moved from an apartment to a house, and they are so excited that their kids have a yard, they rented these." He got out of the car and opened Jack's door, "Come on, I need to find out what time to pick him up, you can walk him in with me."

"Oh I think I'll just wait here if you don't mind." She had started to sink back into the reality of what had happened the night before.

Hotch already had Jack in his arms and decided that he'd talk to her when he returned.

She wondered what was wrong with her. She'd been with Kevin for around two years. Did it really matter so little to her that he was dead? It wasn't as though she didn't care. But how could he have done such a thing? He had worked where she worked. He had known what awful things happened when you got obsessed. But then he's been acting creepy for a while, a long while actually. Had he been sick? _Oh my God he might actually have hurt Hotch!_ The thought made her feel nauseated. And tears began to fill her eyes again. She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself, closing her eyes and leaning her head back.

Hotch was back in less than 10 minutes. He could see that she was back in distress mode. He got back into the driver's seat and looked at her. "OK?"

She took a deep breath and then, "Yeah," she nodded her head a bit too vigorously.

"Penelope, you need to make a statement for the locals. I think it would be wise to get it over with."

"A statement? I hadn't even thought about that. What can I possibly say about last night?"

"It won't just be last night that they ask about. There will be questions about the history of your relationship, you should share with them that last email that he sent. Last night you said he was clingy, bossy and creepy, you'll need to expand on that and be explicit. The sooner this is wrapped up the sooner you can put it behind you." He had reached across and laid his hand over hers.

"I just can't believe this has happened. I thought that experience with Battle was a once in a lifetime thing, how weird is it that the very next guy I dated went off the rails and got himself shot too?"

"Penelope you realize this isn't your fault don't you?" he gave her hand a squeeze.

"I hope it's not, right now I feel like a magnet for lunatics." The tears she had been holding back before started to slowly trickle down her cheeks.

He had a better understanding of it. He could tell that her self-esteem was occasionally low. Derek at the time during the Battle incident hadn't exactly helped that and pretty much sent her running headlong toward Battle. And when that was over with her self-esteem had been even lower and she'd been vulnerable. She was such a selfless person, it really irritated him that she'd been preyed upon by both Battle and Lynch, and then slighted by Morgan. Although to give credit, Morgan had done a lot to make it up to her.

Hotch reached over and lifted her chin while rubbing a tear away with his thumb. "You are definitely not a magnet for lunatics." He gave a comical kind of grin that brought a smile back to her face. "Come on, if we go now, we can get this over with, what do you say?"

She shook her head affirmatively, "Ok."

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM 

He sat next to her during the interview. She'd slipped her hand into his during the difficult parts but shied away during some of the parts of disclosing her relationship. She'd let him belittle her and control her life in certain ways before she'd ended that relationship and she was obviously ashamed of that.

And then the scary part came. They began to show her some of the surveillance pictures and videos. There were pictures of her alone and with all of the men on the team at some point or other. Most of the pictures with the men were either Morgan or Hotch.

Then came the scary part, the videos. There were videos of her walking to her therapist's office, videos of her grocery shopping, of the man from the grocery story walking her groceries to her car, and scariest of all, there were videos of her in her apartment since the break up. And as that sunk in she looked at Hotch, "He has camera's in my apartment!"

She began to shake then, but at least the interview was over. The locals needed to recover the camera's from her apartment for evidence, they would follow her and Hotch there now and Hotch would let them in. Right now she felt too uneasy to go in. This whole thing screamed violation to her, violation of her privacy and personal space. Just the thought of her own apartment was creeping her out.

She sat in the car while Hotch went in and after they came out, she wasn't sure what to do. This was new territory for Hotch as well. He had planned on spending the day with her but was unprepared for having a houseguest for the weekend. There was no way however, that he was going to encourage her to stay there if she wasn't ready.

"Did you need to get anything from inside?" he asked casually.

"Yeah, will you come with me?" She gave him a terrified look.

"Of course I will."

She was jumpy as a cat when they went in, and from the amount of things she was stuffing into a suitcases he'd guess she didn't have plans on returning any time soon. When she grabbed her iPod off of the dresser the cord from her ear buds snagged a troll doll and knocked it to the floor causing her to scream and then run to her bathroom. He felt awful, as he heard her retching and then brushing her teeth. He knew that feeling. He'd felt much the same when he'd returned home after being stabbed by Foyet.

"Penelope are you ok?" he called in through the door.

The door opened, "I'm ok My Liege." Looking up into his face sorrowfully, "What time do you need to pick up Jack?"

Hotch checked his watch, "Now actually, let me make a call."

She stopped his hand, "Only say you're running late, don't have your sister in law take him or anything. You're not losing out on time with your son because of me."

"Penelope I don't mind," he stated. "It's not like I'd call her on a whim."

"Still, can I just bring some things to throw into your refrigerator until I get and extended stay room booked? I'll be gone by this evening I promise."

He looked seriously at her, "You can stay as long as you like. Jack loves having you around, and honestly he's good medicine when you're feeling down."

"Thank you Hotch."

"Aaron," he corrected.

"Aaron."

After that he called the parents of Jack's friend Chad, she packed up the contents of her fridge and they headed to pick up his son.

* * *

**So I just wanted to say thank you for the reviews. I'm glad that I'm not the only one that thinks this is a super cute pairing. I think the idea of pairing Garcia up with either Hotch or Rossi is good because they are so serious. I would think that if I had such a serious job like that that a spouse or SO with a great sense of humor and bright eccentricities would be vital. I really love the way that they write Penelope, that she has such a big heart and is so colorful. I just wish that in canon that they would have given her a guy that didn't have mismatched clothes. It so doesn't fit with her fashionista persona. Although they did seem to fix that a bit with the guy that wanted to see her playing the ukulele.**

**Anyway, thank you all for the support. Enjoy!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Jack was ecstatic when they picked him up. He had been sure that Miss Penny would be gone and that he wouldn't see her for a long time again. "Miss Penny, I thought you'd be gone."

"Oh, no, I'm not. Are you disappointed? Did you want time alone with your dad?" She was beginning to feel such a burden.

"No, I like when you're here. Are you gonna work on my scarf?" he asked hopefully.

"Sure kiddo, if you want me to." This little blonde bundle was so heartwarming.

"Will you sit back here with me?"

"I would love to sit in the back seat with you Jack, as long as your dad doesn't mind."

Hotch remembered how Haley often sat in the back with Jack and he knew that his son felt disconnected back there, but with airbags installed in all front seats now it really was the safer place. He looked questioningly at Penelope, "You don't mind?"

"No not at all." She quickly got out and then slipped into the back seat beside Jack. "So tell me about your day."

"There's not a lot to tell, I jumped a lot. And when dad was late, I got to snack on some pizza rolls."

Penelope giggled, "Pizza rolls? You mean those odd little frozen things?"

"Yeah, Daddy makes them for me sometimes. He likes the meat ones but I only like cheese."

She giggled at that. "Are you a cheese lover little man?" She ruffled his hair.

"It's my favort. I really like mac and cheese."

"Oh I heard about that." She looked up and smiled at Hotch who was watching in the rearview mirror.

"Daddy can we have that for dinner again?"

Penelope looked up to Hotch one more time, he was grimacing at the thought of it.

"Wouldn't you like to have something different tonight Buddy?"

"No."

Penelope laughed outright at that. Once she had quelled her laughter she injected, "How about a compromise? What if I make some homemade mac and cheese and we have some steaks with it?"

"Okay," was Jack's reply and when she looked at Hotch she saw him mouth the words 'thank you.'

"Need anything from the store?" he asked her.

"I'll probably need a few things, but the stuff in the back has been out of the fridge for a while now. We should probably take it to your place first."

Hotch noticed his son starting to crash.

"Why don't I take you and Jack back and get you settled, then you can give me a list."

She was looking at Jack now as well, holding her arm while he leaned his head against it, his eyes at half-mast. "Sounds like a good idea, I think that jumping is tiring stuff." She reached over with her other hand and petted Jacks blonde locks. "He really is the most adorable kid."

When they got back to Hotch's apartment Penelope undid her seatbelt and Jack's, he was sound asleep now and she lifted him and got out of the car.

"You ok with him?" Hotch asked.

She nodded affirmatively, not wanting to wake him.

"OK, I'll grab this stuff then." He went to the back of the car and grabbed her food items and suitcase.

When they got inside Penelope took Jack to his room and removed his shoes after laying him on his bed.

"He'll probably sleep for an hour," Hotch said, leaning against the doorway. "You're good with kids."

"That's because I still am one," she confessed as they exited Jack's room and closed the door.

Hotch couldn't help but smile. She did have some ways about her that were innocent and childlike. It was part of her charm, even if it could get a bit tedious at work during a stressful case. But she was responsible to a fault and always came through when she was needed.

"How about that list?" he prompted. The day had been a bit stressful for him as well and he was looking forward to having a good meal and relaxing once he'd run that last errand.

"Oh right," she set about putting away the perishables and made a list. It was funny to her how Hotch fell into this role of carrying things and running errands, but then she realized, he'd had previous experience with it.

Hotch looked over the list before leaving and with one hand on the door knob turned back toward her and said, "Penelope, I already have milk."

"Of course you do Mon Ami, but you have 2%, and for mac and cheese you need whole milk or the cheese sauce separates."

"Whole milk, no wonder I could never make it. How is it different?"

"Just go get the goods for me sweetness, and I'll give you a quick course in mac and cheese when you get back," she smiled at him.

"Alright. Whole milk," he said once again holding up the list as he walked out the door. Then pointing, "Set the alarm when I leave, ok?"

"Got it."

While he was gone she sat down at her laptop and began to search out apartment listings and extended stay hotels. She couldn't continue to stay here, but going back to her own apartment was unthinkable.

By the time he returned she had a good list going and turned her attention to the food.

Hotch watching over her shoulder at everything she did was feeling a little strange. She'd had him around in the office a few times while she'd conducted searches but usually he was in the field and it was all done via cell phone or video conference. But in this small kitchen his proximity was almost overwhelming to her. _Come on Garcie, he's a friend, and you're just showing him how to make a decent mac and cheese for his son. _But she could feel his breath on her neck as he asked questions and it was becoming unnerving.

She was thankful and yet disappointed when she finally spread the breadcrumbs on top of the dish and told him to pop it in the oven. But as she watched him bend over to place the dish in the oven the view of his jeans stretching tightly over his skinny ass was almost her undoing.

"Uh… Aaron… uhm. Would you mind if I let you take care of the steaks while I took a shower?"

"Not at all, go right ahead, how long do I leave the macaroni in the oven though?"

"Oh, just until it browns on the top, it will probably take about 20-25 minutes."

"Ok you go ahead and freshen up."

Escaping his company was more like it. She was starting to sweat, sheesh. She was about ready for a cold shower. She grabbed her bag and walked past him toward the bathroom, unable to conceal from the long time profiler her jumpy and nervous mood. He couldn't help but smirk. Even with all that had happened in the last 24 hours, she was not beyond being affected by him as he'd hovered over her purposefully as she cooked. Either she'd be distracted from the chaos they'd experienced or she'd be in sensory overload.

He knew he probably shouldn't be risking it, but then on the other hand this might restore the balance that she needed for her crisis of belief, and besides that, it just felt damn good having her around. She was soft and warm and she smelled so fantastic, she was also funny and vibrant and round in all the right places. _Oh get a grip Hotch, this is your kooky tech analyst… Yeah the one who's been looking after you like some kind of guardian angel, the one you can't get by without._

Wow, this was getting confusing.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

"Daddy?" Jack waited for Hotch to turn and notice him and then rushed to his dad.

"Hey buddy, did you have a good nap?" Hotch reached down and picked the boy up for a hug.

Burying his face in his dad's neck he squeaked, "I thought Miss Penny was gonna be here."

"Oh hey, it's ok, she's still here." Hotch rubbed Jack's back.

"I don't see her."

"Well, Miss Penny is going to stay with us tonight, she went in to take a shower. Remember I said she was kinda sad?" He gave the boy a second to nod into his shoulder, "I think spending time with you is helping, how about after dinner we watch a movie together?"

"Ok… Daddy, I'm hungry."

"Ok kiddo, food is almost done ok?" he set the boy down and reached for a potholder. Opening the oven door he said. "Hey look at this huh? What do you think?"

"Oh yum, is that the mac and cheese? It looks like mommy's"

"It does, doesn't it? And guess what, she taught me how to make it too."

"That's cool, it's my favort."

"FA-VOR-ITE" Hotch sounded out the word by syllables.

"Uh Daddy, Miss Penny is still in the bathroom?"

"Yep, she'll be back here in a few minutes I think."

"Daddy… I gotta go potty."

Hotch smiled, "Oh right, ok, uh… hang on." He walked toward the bathroom, "Penelope? You almost done? Jack's up, and needing to use the facilities."

She opened the door and Hotch noticed there was a suspicious lack of steam although the distinct smell of her strawberry soap. "All done."

As she stepped out Jack bolted and the startling swoosh as Jack hurriedly closed the door propelled Penelope stumbling forward. She stopped with her hands on Hotch's shoulders and his hands at her waist. _Shit!_ That just undid all the good the tepid shower had done to cool her down.

_God, but she smells good! Get a hold of yourself man!_ He was screaming at himself to settle down before he got carried away and kissed her.

_Was he just about to kiss me? Oh geeze this is just great, now I'm hallucinating my fantasies. _

"I'm sorry about that, at that age urges need immediate attention." _To say nothing of what kind of attention they need at my age. Did I really just think that?_

_Urges? Did he really just say 'urges'?_ She slowly stepped back withdrawing her hands. "Oh, I completely understand." She would liked to have played that cool but she looked worse than a deer caught in the headlights and she knew that he knew it. _Oh God! I am so __screwed__… DON'T USE THAT WORD Garcie! I am so… embarrassed._

_Oh yeah, she so wants you Hotchner. Wine, go poor some wine! _"Let's go to the kitchen, the macaroni is out and the steaks are resting."

As she pulled away and preceded him to the kitchen, he noticed she was in lounging pants and long t-shirt but was pretty sure there was no bra underneath. _Oh dear God, how am I going to get through dinner with that in front of me?_

"So I was thinking wine for us and milk for Jack." He was trying to avoid watching her too obviously and giving himself away.

"Sure, I'd be ok with one glass." She was remembering the night before and how she'd woken up. She remembered some time a while back after a fight with her now deceased ex and waking up cluelessly to the sound of Derek in her shower. She didn't want to seem paranoid, but she knew from experience that she'd better not have more than one glass.

_Or three or four. _"One it is, let me get the glasses," he said as he set the open wine bottle on the table. Tonight he'd chosen a Riesling, he figured that fruity and sweet would appeal to her more.

Jack came to the table and sat in his usual spot. Hotch brought the glasses and set a wine glass in front of himself and Penelope and a tall glass in front of Jack. "I want a glass like you guys Daddy."

"Oh I don't think so Jack, these glasses are pretty delicate."

"I'll be careful Daddy, I want a grown up glass."

"Alright," he gave in, "You can't take it away from the table though ok?"

"Ok, I promise."

"And you're still getting milk…"

"Ok."

Hotch got another wine glass and poured milk into it, then placed it in front of Jack and poured the wine in the other two glasses. He sat and lifted his own glass, "To a much better grade of macaroni and cheese."

"Here, here," she said raising her glass.

Jack raised his glass as well but didn't say anything.

The steaks were cooked to perfection, the man at least had some culinary skills. And the guys seemed to be really enjoying the cheesy pasta. Jack however poked at his tiny bit of steak, but Hotch had cut it into small pieces and had given the boy some ketchup.

When dinner was over Hotch put his napkin on the table, "Well that was wonderful. Thank you for the delightful compromise," he said looking at Penelope.

She beamed back, "Any time."

"Well, before we start the movie I think I'll make use of the shower. I'll let you two pick out the movie."

Hotch took a hot shower unlike Penelope. He was rather enjoying this tension and had no desire for outside stimuli to quell what he was feeling. However, being in the shower would be a good time to take the edge off. As the hot spray poured over his face, neck and chest, he let his head fall forward and placed a hand on the shower wall in front of him. With his other hand he reached down to relieve the pressure that had been building since last night.

When he emerged from the bathroom in t-shirt and thin sweatpants he found Jack and Penelope still sitting at the table. The dishes had been rinsed and stacked in the dishwasher and the table held her two laptops with her and Jack each looking at one and his own set up at the end of the table playing some kind of ridiculous tune.

"What's going on here?" he asked curiously.

"Oh, well Jack and I decided that instead of a movie we would all play a video game together," she explained. "Sit down BossMan, we're gonna gag some cogs."

"Gag some cogs? Garcia… this isn't violent is it? And what is a cog?"

"It's a robot Daddy, and they are trying to take over Toon Town, so we have to play jokes on em, and when the jokes confuse them they fall apart."

"Oh," he looked back and Penelope sheepishly.

"I'm not completely stupid when it comes to kids ya know." When he tipped his head to the side she followed with, "I know, I know, it's in your nature to worry. Now come on, first things first, we have to build your toon."

Both Hotchner's tried to opt for reasonable toon names but she wouldn't have it. For herself she settled on 'Princess PolkaDotted SquooshyPants' and for Jack,'Wacky Jack SmilesAlot' and then came Hotch, 'Big Daddy Sugary HugaBear" which made Jack giggle all night.

They each made their silly toons and ran around together in toon town defeating the cogs. They giggled and talked and hooted with laughter until Jack began to yawn. Looking at the clock it was almost 9, past Jack's bedtime. "Time to get you to bed Buddy." Closing down the program Hotch stood and came around the table.

As his dad reached down to scoop him up he asked, "Can Miss Penny tuck me in too?"

"Sure she can, let's just get you ready for bed and then maybe she can read your story?"

Jack snuggled into his dad as they made their way to his room, "She does good voices when she reads.

After they got Jack into his pajamas, they called for Penelope. Hotch was leaning on the headboard with jack tucked into his side. Jack handed her his favorite book. It was a little young for him but he loved the story so much that he hadn't outgrown it. It was called _Salt & Pepper at the Pike Place Market. _

Jack giggled and sighed as she read about the two dogs who had switched places. And finally before too long his breathing was steady and shallow. Hotch sat there silently watching in a bit of amazement. He'd known that she was special and took responsibility for almost too much which is why he'd picked her to be a back up for his sister in law where Jack was concerned. But she was amazing with his son and his appreciation for her had grown immeasurably in the last few hours.

As they exited the room and closed the door, his attraction to her from before had morphed into an overwhelming emotional landslide and he leaned against the wall pulling her too him. He was wearing his usual stoic mask and Penelope couldn't read it at all. She was in mass confusion as he stared at her, until finally his lips crashed upon hers and she melted into him.

He was a master at kissing, gentle and yet completely passionate, and completely and totally in control. His hands went from kneading the flesh at her hips to encircling her back with one hand and moving into the hair at the back of her neck which made her give a little whimper. The sound did nothing more than further ignite the fire within him. He deepened the kiss, his tongue massaging back and forth against her own.

Reality finally nudged its way into her brain however and she backed away breaking the kiss. He looked with concern as a terrified look settled on her face and she all but ran to the living room.

"Penelope, what is it? Have I been reading things wrong?" he put one hand behind his neck, trying to replay her reactions to him throughout the day.

In her mass confusion she tried to register his words, "Read things wrong?" _What is it he's talking about? _"Hotch, hello…" she pointed to herself, "Garcia here, you know the crazy technical analyst with funky clothes and crazy hair?"

"I know exactly who you are Penelope," he sighed.

"Well then what are you doing? Guys like you don't go for girls like me."

"What kind of guy am I?" he had begun to advance on her but she continued to back away.

"Classy, handsome, with tight abs and gorgeous ass… Stop closing in on me." She halfway screamed.

"Shhh, you'll wake Jack." He temporarily stopped his approach. "You think I have a gorgeous ass?" he tilted his head to the side and smiled.

"That's what you zero in on?" she huffed. "The point is men like that don't go for women like me?"

He crossed his arms then, "Well what kind of women do they go for?"

This time it was she to tilt her head to the side. "Oh come on, beautiful, tiny, petite little things like Haley."

He made a face, he knew this was going to be about her self esteem. "Haley was beautiful. Even with the freckles and glasses she had when we met." He leaned against the back of the couch which let her relax but his arms were still crossed, and he became thoughtful. "She even had a few delicious curves of her own back then, but she got used to a certain type of appreciation she received in drama club and was determined to present a certain image as we matured. That tiny little figure wasn't always hers, and wasn't my preference but it gave her a certain confidence… I was rather hoping that wasn't going to be an issue here tonight."

She had no words, he'd just blown her every precept of him and his 'type' out the window. She took a long shaky breath and then exhaled. "So I just ruined the moment with insecurities?"

He unfolded his arms, "Come over here and find out."

_Why does he always have to look so damned intimidating? _She took a few unsure steps toward him and finally a bit of a smile broke across his face.

"You really think I have a gorgeous ass?"

"Oh God yes!" she breathed out as his lips descended on hers. This time she let her hands roam over his body. _Mmm, the man is chiseled. _She'd never felt anyone that felt this good. She let her hands wander down to his glutes and felt him smile into their kiss.

"Does it feel as good as it looks?" he asked as he pulled his mouth away and trailed kisses up to her ear.

"Oooh better if that's possible," she whispered. She was completely enjoy his hands as they roamed over her and cupped the full rounded mounds of her own ass.

She let her hands roam up over his chest grazing the nubs on his chest and causing a groan. "Penelope," he pulled back then touched his forehead to hers and took a breath. "On one hand I don't want to rush this, on the other… I don't want to let this opportunity escape me."

She understood that feeling completely. She was in shock that he was putting the moves on her. Never in her most wild imagination did she ever think that Aaron Hotchner would want her in this way. But the idea of stopping and taking time to think this over was torturous. She was already wet and throbbing and oh so sensitive everywhere. Her body in fact felt like one big bundle of nerves. "Please don't stop."

That was more than enough encouragement for him. He slid his hands up under her t-shirt as he kissed her neck. He felt up her sides as his thumbs teased the sides of her breasts. She shivered under his hands. _She's so responsive!_ He let his hands move onto her breast and heard her gasp.

While letting her head fall back to allow his lips access to her neck, she moved her hands around again to caress that fantastic ass.

Her breasts felt incredible. Full and firm yet soft and almost more than he could wrap each hand around. "Penelope, I want to look at you," he whispered into her ear. He pulled away then and looked at her questioningly.

Her eyes were filled with lust and desire and she gave the slightest nod. With that he pulled her t-shirt over her head. "Beautiful." He touched her again while looking at her breasts. "Perfect and beautiful."

She felt exposed and vulnerable but his praise helped relax her and when he began trailing kisses over her she was completely distracted from her self-consciousness. And when he drew one hard nub into his mouth her hands vice gripped his ass and her knees buckled. Her breathing was heavy and she was shaking as he quickly grabbed her to him to keep her from falling.

_Are you kidding me?_ he thought. He'd had to become a scholar of foreplay and a master of positions to bring Haley to orgasm. It usually had taken an entire evening. "Did you just come?" he asked into the hair at her neck.

Her head was buried into his neck, she was mortified. He hadn't even touched the lower region of her body. He was going to think she was some desperate weirdo.

"Are you embarrassed?"

She could only nod her head into him, too humiliated to speak.

"Don't be. Don't you know how sexy that is?"

"No," was her quiet muffled response.

"Well it's incredibly sexy, here..." He took her hand and guided it down to feel his rock hard shaft.

"Oh my God," she whispered. "You really want me." It was more of a statement than a question. She was just reassuring herself.

"Very much, let's move this into the bedroom."

He was careful to pick up her t-shirt and bring it with them. Jack had an uncanny way of waking before him even when he woke early and he didn't want to leave tell-tale signs laying around.

Once they reached the bedroom he took her in his arms again. Whispering in her ear he asked, "Do you remember me calling you once and you answering the phone with…'Rainmaker, how wet do you want it'?"

"Oh my God, you remember that?"

"Oh yeah, and I want it really wet."

* * *

**Just in case you all don't recognize it... The Rainmaker phrase was real, and is from Season 1 Episode 6. I just loved that and was disappointed that he didn't at least get an irritated look on his face. Funny how tolerant he's been over the years of her quirky ways but... I love that he appreciates her not so much in spite of her quirkiness but maybe because of it? She certainly does brighten up the show, it wouldn't be nearly so successful without her!**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Their night together was mind-blowing. She experienced more orgasms than she could ever remember, and had been captivated by his control and command in the bedroom. He'd been stunned by her willingness for oral and thought his head would explode with the orgasm she'd given him. It was all he could do to not lock his son out all day Sunday so that he could spend the day in bed with her. But truth be told, neither of them were used to that kind of exhausting, mind altering sex and they both needed a break.

Spending the day with Jack was perfect. They packed a lunch and took to the park where Hotch and Jack played catch and Penelope used her laptop again to look for apartments. It was still cold outside, unlike the extraordinarily warm day that they'd had the day before for early spring so they were all dressed warmly.

"What are you looking at?" Hotch dropped on blanket next to her, while Jack ran over to the playground.

"Some new digs, I can't impose on the hospitable Hotchner's forever."

"Pen, you know it's not a good idea to make life changing decisions after something like what you've been through."

She sighed, "Aaron, I just can't go back to that apartment."

"Ok well how about this, stay the week with us, and if you still feel the same, I'll help you look."

"Oh Aaron, are you sure? How will that be for Jack?"

"Jack will be fine, I explained to him before that you were sad, similar to how he and I felt after his mom died. I told him that you spending time with him made you feel better."

"Well that is incredibly true. Spending time with Jack restores my belief in all things mystical and good and wonderful."

Hotch smiled, "He does tend to do that. He's a good kid."

"No he's a terrific kid, I think it's in the genes."

He leaned up from his position laying on the blanket beside her. He kissed her, chastely or so he intended, but once his lips touched hers he wanted to taste her. As he pulled back, "Bubble gum toothpaste again huh?"

She giggled, "Afraid so, he drug me by the hand right after breakfast."

"Well its growing on me." He leaned in for another kiss. "Guess what else is in the jeans."

She didn't quite get his meaning until his eyes drifted down.

Following his gaze she gasped. "You are deliciously naughty Aaron Hotchner, I had no idea how much. How do you ever hope to rid yourself of your houseguest with all that going on?"

"Well getting rid of you is not exactly my priority." He had been smiling, but now the serious mask was back. "Pen, we will need to keep this on the down low at work. Not because I'm ashamed…"

She interrupted him at that point placing her hand on his am, "I know, I know all that. I'd just as soon not have to face the condescending look on Strauss. The woman's got a look that can turn a person to salt I swear."

He gave a small laugh, "I just don't want you thinking that I'm embarrassed or ashamed, I just want some space until we see where this is going. Are you ok with that?"

"More than ok. Besides, it will be fun to have a secret that the profilers don't know."

"Well just don't flaunt that you have a secret, it's like waving catnip in front of a cat for our team."

"Don't I know it."

"And you don't have a poker face like I have."

"My darling, no one has a poker face like you have, you are one of a kind my sweet." She raised her eyebrows, "In soooo many ways."

He smirked and then got up to go check on Jack.

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM 

The following morning they each took their own car to work. He followed her but in the event that a case took them away she needed a car, not to mention the protective way that Morgan often had of walking her to her car.

They arrived earlier than everyone else and yet he still waited several minutes to walk in after she entered the building.

The day passed in its usual flurry of activity and she was able to tap down her feelings enough so that she didn't draw unnecessary attention.

Even she wouldn't have known anything was different in fact had he not whispered in her ear while she was pouring coffee, "Are you showing that much cleavage on purpose?"

She had been too afraid to look up at him, she knew she'd give herself away if anyone saw her. "I've worn this dress here like a dozen times before," she answered back in a whisper.

"Well if you have it looks different now," had been his muted reply before they had each gone back to their respective offices.

No new cases… that was always a plus. It gave them time to catch up on paperwork and it meant that they could enjoy this week as well. The thing that brought the big glitch was the news of Lynch running around the office on other floors. Eventually, all things made the entire circuit.

A secretary from the floor below (who just happened to be crushing on a genius with multiple Ph.D.'s) came up to get the skinny. "Hi Dr. Reid…"

"Hello Jeanine, what brings you up here today?" he asked not looking lest she see him roll his eyes.

"Oh I was just wondering how Garcia was after what happened this weekend," she said half sitting on the corner of his desk.

For once he wasn't in the "know" on current events and it bothered him. He looked her square on and asked, "What happened this weekend Jeanine?" he gave her a blinding smile that had her verbally puking everything she knew all over him.

Her account had been sketchy though, she knew where he'd been shot, and that he'd been about to assault someone but she didn't know who. There had been no disclosure on the stalking, it had even been news to her that he'd been previously fired from the bureau.

Reid had dismissed her as quickly as possible, wanting to find someone on his team to tell. It wasn't often that he knew something like that before the rest of them, and since no one had said anything he knew that they didn't know.

It was lunchtime and everyone was out except for Hotch, he was in his office with a stack of reports to complete with an untouched sandwich on the corner of his desk.

Knock, knock, knock. "Hotch?"

Hotch barely looked up. "Yes Reid, what is it?" He continued looking at reports.

"Did you know that Kevin Lynch was shot and killed on Friday night? And Garcia hasn't mentioned it at all. Do you think she knows?"

Hotch sat back and looked up at Reid. "Come in and close the door please."

Reid closed the door and sat in the chair in front of Hotch's desk.

"Where did you hear about it?" he questioned Reid.

"One of the secretaries from downstairs came up to spread the news."

"What did she say exactly?"

"She said that he was shot by the police who barely stopped him from assaulting someone. And that he died on the scene," Reid supplied.

"I need to go talk to Garcia, let me know when the team is back for lunch." With that he got up leaving Reid in his office and went to Garcia's lair.

Her door was open but they were all in a habit of knocking anyway. It helped make your presence known, in this line of work it was easy to get jumpy if someone walked up on you unaware.

"Enter the abyss of all knowledge," she said swinging around. "Oh, boss..." then quietly, "What are you doing here? I thought we said…"

"Garcia it's not out of the ordinary for me to come and speak to you." But she was further concerned when he closed door behind him.

"The team is about to be informed of what happened with Kevin this weekend. I am going to control the information. I thought I did have a handle on this with the locals to give you a couple of days but that obviously hasn't worked. There is a buzz going around the building but I think disclosing a bit more to the team would be wise."

"Well what are you going to tell them."

He explained his strategy to her and with her consent he went back to his office.

Reid buzzed to let him know that everyone had returned and he asked Reid to gather everyone but Garcia to the conference room.

When he entered the conference room everyone but Reid thought that they had a case. He took a seat and folded his hands on the table in front of him. "I wanted a chance to talk to you all about Garcia."

"Baby girl? Why is something wrong?" Morgan asked.

"There was an incident on Friday night."

"What kind of incident?" Morgan was almost on his feet.

"On Friday night Garcia came over to help me with some digital photos and videos of Haley for Jack. While she was there we noticed Lynch sitting outside watching the building."

There were loud intakes of breath around the table, and when Hotch looked up Reid's eyebrows were raised.

Hotch continued, "I went out to confront him and he became hostile. I called the emergency line and the local's came. I thought it would have a peaceful outcome. However," he fidgeted his hands, "he made a run at me with a tire iron and one of the officers on the scene fatally wounded him."

He heard all manner of exclamations from around the table. Such as "Oh my God," "Shit," "Poor Pen," and from Rossi, "Jesus Aaron, you could have been really hurt, or worse."

"Well there's more," Hotch commanded the attention of the room again, "He had his laptop in his car and from that they were able to determine that he'd been stalking Garcia. There were surveillance photos and videos, and some hidden cameras were even recovered from her apartment."

Rossi's hand came slamming down on the table. "I knew I never liked that weasely son of a bitch. How's Kitten doing?"

Morgan looked fit to be tied. And rubbed his hand over his head, and action which betrayed his agitation.

"Garcia is doing well actually. She has secured a counselor but doesn't want to talk about it. She's made that pretty clear. So I'm going to ask all of you not to ask her about it. You can let her know that you're there if she wants to talk but leave it there. She'll open up to you when and if she's ready." Then he looked pointedly at Derek. "That includes you Morgan." He paused then and looked around the room. "You all know the depressed state she's been in these last months, I don't want to aggravate that. Do Not Press Her. Are we clear?"

"I can't believe she didn't call me right away," Morgan said. "She's gotta be going through hell over this. Jesus, I never liked that guy, but I never thought he was capable of this."

Hotch thought back over the weekend and while there were some pretty tough and rocky moments for Penelope, it was almost humorous how far off Derek was in his estimation of her going through hell, ecstasy was a more accurate term in general. It was hard for him to maintain his stoic mask, he was thankful for all the years of practice in looking so serious.

Hotch stood up, "Back to work?"

They all nodded and followed him out of the conference room.

When he reached his office he sent a text:

- It's done, let me know if it gets to be too much. I'll send you home for the day.

Then he watched out of his window as they left the bullpen one by one and b-lined for her office.

He didn't back so obviously she made it through the day. And an hour before quitting time he sent another text:

- Give me a 20 min head start, I'll pick up Jack and meet you at home.

She replied with:

- K, see you there.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Jack was more animated that evening than Hotch knew he'd been in the last year or even before, since the divorce. It was nice to see his son so happy, but if it was all do to Penelope it did worry him in case this was a fluke and not really headed anywhere. Although he knew where he wanted to head right then as they sat around the table and she leaned forward listening to Jack tell the story of being the best reader in class.

She was still wearing the dress from work that day and leaning forward seemed to push her cleavage up and outward. She was decent enough but… When you knew what was there, it made it hard to resist the urge to reach out and touch.

They had a blast talking with Jack about his day. And she loved watching Aaron help him with his homework, he was such a wonderful father. In fact watching the man smile was so damn sexy that alone could almost give her an orgasm. Maybe it was good that he smiled so rarely at work.

They'd had dinner and watched some TV, and then she'd had Jack read _Salt & Pepper_ to her this time but he'd made her do the voices before he'd gone to sleep. Jack was certainly good medicine for the soul. But by the time he was down for the night, the sexual energy was a tangible thing.

It had been a while for both she and Hotch, and that coupled with the fact that they'd both found the best sex of their lives, they were practically ripping each other's clothes off once they were alone.

It still surprised him how sensually sensitive she was, he hadn't been with many women, Haley had been his high school sweetheart. He'd had one indiscretion when the marriage was failing and one brief encounter after she'd divorced him, but since her death he hadn't found himself attracted to anyone, or so he'd thought.

With Haley he had worked hard trying to make sure she experienced at least some pleasure from intimacy, but with Penelope… a few strategically placed kisses and a slight touch had her coming undone in front of him. It was by far the most erotic thing he'd ever seen. She was an incredibly sensual woman, and more than giving, in and out of the bedroom.

Haley had rarely initiated sex, and once per night was more than enough for her. Penelope was insatiable. As often as he was ready she was eager and waiting. And initiating? Well, he'd woken up to her hands caressing him more than once. And they'd barely had four nights together so far and only three of those had related to sex. He knew that she could easily become an addiction for him.

For Penelope, she'd usually been with men who were unsure of themselves and she'd usually taken control prompting them on everything to do, but here with this man he was in complete control and she was free to relax and enjoy. And it sure didn't hurt that he hit the ever illusive g-spot which most men never found. Aaron had found it every time and her orgasms were so intense that she had nearly passed out a couple of times.

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Jack was in a particularly good mood the next morning and was sure to sit next to 'Miss Penny' while they all consumed their cereal, juice, toast, and coffee for Penelope and Hotch. They were supposed to play some relay after lunch at school today and he was telling her what a good runner he was, just like his dad.

As Penelope listened, she looked up at Hotch and the look on his face was priceless, never had anything touched her heart as deeply as these two guys. She reached down and hugged Jack, "I know you are going to be fantastic today, and you're right, you are just like your dad." With the last part she looked up conveying all of her appreciation in her expression and was rewarded with one of his rare but wonderful smiles.

As they left that morning she went straight to work while he dropped Jack off at school. This allowed for their opportunity to arrive at work separately. She walked in and gave the usual banter with Morgan, and then proceeded to her 'lair.' Little did she realize that she'd been followed. "Hey Baby Girl," he called out as she reached her door.

She turned and saw him but continued through the door. "What can I do for you today my gorgeous dark knight?"

"Baby Girl I don't get it. For a year you walk around here with your frown hanging to the ground, then you have a traumatic experience and you seem better not worse, what's up with that?"

"I don't want to talk about this Derek," she said as she put her things away and sat in her chair starting up her computers.

"Come on Penelope, it's me. Dish," he prodded.

"I don't want to talk about this, my friend."

"Penelope you always talk to me."

She twirled around in her chair, "Derek I love you, but let me be clear, I do not want to talk about this with you." She hated keeping secrets from Morgan, but she wasn't about to give anything away either. Even if this didn't need to be on the down low, she'd keep it to herself until she understood it and knew if it was really something monumental. Some things you have to keep just for yourself, at least for a while.

"You know I love you right? You can talk to me."

"Please don't smother me, I need some space." And with the weight of the pressure she did break down. She really had been on a whirlwind of emotions. The lows were low, and the highs were sky high, and it was confusing.

"Whoa, whoa, I'm sorry ok. I didn't mean to upset you."

"I know you didn't, but you really need to understand a respect a person's boundaries," she responded. And then getting up from her desk, "I need some air." She hurried toward the bullpen and when she saw Reid she asked. "Is Hotch in yet?"

"Uh, yeah. He just came in like a minute and 25 seconds ago." He looked at her with a bit of concern. "Is everything ok?"

"I'm fine, I'm really fine!" she snapped. And then hurried toward Hotch's office.

Morgan came strolling back, feeling exasperated.

"Did you see Garcia? She seemed really upset," Reid questioned.

"Yeah man, I tried to talk to her and she completely wigged out on me." Morgan sat on his desk.

"Well I thought Hotch said …"

"She's my best friend man!"

"Yeah well your best friend just made a b-line for the team leader's door."

"Oh man!" Morgan slumped, threw his head back and closed his eyes.

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She wanted to just rush into his office and slam the door, but remembering that she worked with a bunch of profilers made her careful even though it was in her nature to be expressive.

Knock, Knock, Knock. "Boss?" she sniffled.

"Pen-Garcia," he rushed toward her, shut the door and led her to the sofa. Taking a seat on the coffee table again as he had once before. "What's all this? A half hour ago you seemed on top of the world."

"I was, I still am, in a way."

He handed her a Kleenex, "Care to explain?" he wanted so much to take her in his arms and comfort her, but he knew that his office was probably the focus of everyone's attention right now.

"I just think that my emotions are a bit out of control right now. When I'm with you and Jack everything seems so good and so easy and wonderful… But it can't stay that way can it? I'm so afraid of screwing up and letting on, and Morgan and his questions are just…"

"Morgan?"

Oh she hadn't wanted to get her best friend into trouble, but that was the problem. She's afraid of him asking the right, or wrong question and her giving too much away, and then this delicate balance will crash and she'll lose this bit of happiness that she just found. And then where will she be, lost and depressed again and dwelling on Kevin, and thinking about Battle, and how she just wants to run as far as she can get.

"Was Morgan pressing you this morning?" He took her hand between his two. "Penelope you've had a lot to deal with in the last two days, good and bad."

She barely stifled a sob, and it was breaking his heart not to comfort her the way he wanted. He reached across and wiped a tear from her face. "I think I need a break from here," she said.

"Will you do something for me?" he asked. When she looked up at him questioningly, he explained, "Will you call the counselor you've been seeing and see if they have some time today? I think it would be a good idea if you could talk to someone where you felt safe."

She stayed silent and nodded her head.

"Call me later if you'd like company. I can feign an out of office meeting. But if you need space I can respect that too, just let me know you're ok."

"I will, and thank you."

"I'm sorry I can't be more comforting. I feel like a fish in a bowl right now." He was sincerely sorrowful and she knew it.

"I know." She gave him such a soul-rendering look that he knew she understood.

He took a deep breath and sat back releasing her hand. "You'll call me later."

"Yeah, I will," she said as she reached the door.

When she left his office he stayed where he was for a moment longer clenching his hands. He hated not being able to hold her and let her cry on him. And he was damn mad at Morgan too. He also knew that walking her to her car was a bad idea. The need to comfort her would be too strong and there were cameras everywhere. Instead he waited to see her walk from her office where she would have gathered her things and walk toward the doors. And he made to walk toward Rossi's office so he could see her safely out.

As she made to walk through Morgan saw her, "Baby Girl where you goin? Are you leaving?"

"Morgan," Hotch called out.

Morgan looked up at the unit leader.

"Garcia is taking the day off, if you need anything researched run it through TA Jenner."

Morgan could read what was unsaid. He too was a profiler and knew his boss just told him to bug off.

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Penelope had called her counselor but they couldn't fit her in that day, not unless she waited for the end of the day and the woman counselor stayed after hours. They did however have an appointment open first thing in the morning. So she'd opted for that. _Maybe a drive to clear my head. _

She would love shopping too, but until she decided what to do about her apartment, she couldn't see that as a good idea. It was hard enough with many of her valuables in the trunk of her car and her essentials (which were considerable) stuffed into Aaron's place. _A drive it is,_ she thought.

But just a half hour out, her car sputtered to a stop and wouldn't restart. _Great, just great. This can't be happening to me! _She began to cry, a real soaking cry. This time she cried out all the crap, all the yukky feelings she had about Kevin, all the trauma of watching him from Aaron's window Friday night. She cried for all her insecurities which held her back from more mature relationships in the past. She cried because her parents weren't there for her during all of this. She just cried until she had nothing left. Not realizing that it had been hours since she'd left the office and that she hadn't checked back in with Aaron.

Her phone had never gone off so it hadn't dawned on her.

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Hotch gave Penelope enough time to have coffee and meet with her therapist if she could get in, and then tried to call. There was no answer. She was probably in with her therapist when he called. He waited an hour, still no answer. Another hour later, still nothing. Now he was worrying. After another hour he called his sister in law to see if she would pick Jack up from after school daycare.

_Now, how do I figure out where she went? _He pulled up her personnel record and found the name of her therapist and then called. A few stern words to the receptionist had her confessing that there had been no appointments available and that she'd booked Ms. Garcia for first thing in the morning.

Damn, and he had no Garcia to see where she might have used a credit card recently. He tried to recall store names on shopping bags he's seen her with since he'd known her. Her favorite coffee shop he knew… no he didn't, she'd switched since the Battle incident. He was just about to call another TA for help when his phone rang and thankfully it was her.

_Oh thank God! _"Penelope where are you? I've called three times." He was really exasperated.

Oh boy, now did she feel bad. "I know, somehow my phone was on silent. It must have gotten jostled around in my purse. I'm so sorry."

"Are you ok?"

"Well, yeah pretty much."

"What does that mean?" he barked.

"Well, I'm broke down. I thought I'd drive for a bit but my car stopped and won't restart."

"Did you call someone?"

"No, I have a ton of my stuff in the trunk and I didn't want to just have it towed off with my things in it."

Aaron took a deep breath. "Tell me where you are."

Well, I don't see any mile markers around… I'm on Hwy 1. I'll send you the co-ords on your phone.

He reached her in 25 minutes, speeding a bit along the way. When he saw her car, he rushed up to her door. She was out of the door before he reached her and he grabbed her with relief. "Pen, I was so worried." He was hugging her.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to worry you."

"How long have you been broke down here?"

"A while."

"What you do you mean 'a while'? Why didn't you call sooner?" He was more than a little exasperated with her at this point and pulled away from her.

"Well, I had a little tantrum I guess and bawled my eyes out And I was so exhausted after, I fell asleep. I'm so sorry."

"Pen, why didn't you call me when you couldn't get an appointment with your counselor?"

"How did you know I couldn't get an appointment?"

He raised his voice by this point, "Jesus, Penelope! I've been frantic for more than 2 hours trying to find you and wondering why you wouldn't be answering your phone!"

"Oh God, I'm sorry, I didn't realize."

He turned around, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. Then turning back around, "Come on, let's get your stuff into the SUV and call a tow truck.

Her guilt kept her silent. After all he'd been through in the past her little hysterical disappearing act couldn't have been pleasant. She shook her head and opened her trunk.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

They got into the SUV and waited for the tow truck. Hotch was staring at the dashboard trying to will away the anxiety that had been with him most of the day and Penelope felt the thickness of tension in the car.

"Aaron?"

He didn't answer but turned toward her giving her his full attention.

"Never for one minute would I ever intentionally cause you stress or pain." She began to tear up again. "Will you please forgive me for getting so emotional and doing that very thing? I really am so very sorry for it."

He reached out drawing her to him. She hugged him with one arm while caressing his face with the other. He buried his face in her hair smelling the wonderful fruity, tropical scent of her hair products. He rubbed her back and whispered to her, "I'm glad you're ok… I guess I just really felt guilty that I couldn't hold you close this morning when you were upset."

"You comforted me this morning. It doesn't matter that you weren't holding me. You held my hand and you looked at me and told me all that I needed to know. You called to check up on me… Do you have any idea what an incredible man you are?"

He gave a slight laugh. "Is this some kind of unique 'Garcia-way' of getting out of the dog house?"

"Is it working?" she asked giggling.

"Yeah, actually it is," he said as he pulled back. He cradled her face in his hands and pressed his forehead to hers. "This things that's happening between us… It feels like something special, I'm afraid of it getting messed up too. "

"Aaron?"

"Yeah," he breathed.

"The tow truck guy is at your window."

"Oh," he turned around and the guys face was right there. It's a good thing he had steady nerves. He rolled down the window, passed the keys from Penelope to the tow truck driver and gave him instruction on where to take the car.

"Well we should get back we'll need to pick up Jack in a while."

"Actually we have the evening free, Jessica is picking up Jack."

"Oh Aaron, the guilt just isn't going to stop tonight is it? I don't want to come between you spending time with Jack."

"Pen, look at me."

She looked up into his oh so serious face.

"We've been together nonstop for days, we've spent the nights in each other's arms and the intimate times have been absolutely amazing. But we haven't even been out on a date. Let's spend tonight, guilt free, and have dinner and talk, tell jokes, or whatever. Ok?"

"Ok, I'm in," she smiled up at him. "You and me, on an honest and true date, I like it."

He couldn't help but smile too as he started up the vehicle. "You have an amazing smile," he told her.

"As you do you my sweet. So where we goin?"

"Well there's an awesome little BBQ restaurant in Woodbridge."

"BBQ? Isn't that like ALL meat?"

"You eat meat, I've seen you."

"Yeah, I eat some meat with a lot of veggies. But BBQ is like ALL meat."

"Actually they have a dish called 'meatless BBQ.' Brave enough to try it?"

"I'll try anything once Lover," she said grasping his free hand.

"Well… I'll just keep that in mind," he grinned.

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Penelope couldn't figure out of she was appalled or completely captivated as she watch Hotch go after his food. His jacket was off, his shirt sleeves were rolled up his arms and he practically had BBQ sauce up to his wrists.

She shook her head. "So who exactly are you and what have you done with Aaron Hotchner?"

"What?" he said with a mouthful. He had an array of ribs sitting on the table in a number of different flavors.

She on the other hand had an organized dish filled with lots of veggies and a couple of skewers of meatless BBQ on the side.

He picked up a small rib from one of the side plates and held it up in offering. "Honey?"

She shook her head, "Just keep it clean, and don't call me honey." She couldn't help but laugh at her own joke which appeared to be completely lost on him. "What you don't remember saying that to me?"

"I have no idea what you're referring to."

"Oh geeze, Well it was several years ago. Do you remember the bank robber case where they guy was making the hostages strip?"

"How could I forget, it was all I could do not to wring that guys neck."

"Well when you were asking me to look for physical markers for him from the videos I called you honey, and you said to me 'just keep it clean and don't call me honey.' After that I just got into the habit of calling you 'sir'."

"Oh," he was momentarily struck. "I do tend to be a bit uptight don't I?" he looked slightly wary in case this had been a big deal to her.

"You're the boss, I think you have to be a bit uptight," she excused him. "I remember I was trying to lighten your mood for some reason. But you'd seemed more keyed up over that case than usual."

"It was guilt."

"Guilt? Guilt for what?"

"I'd missed a pretty important doctor's appointment for Jack. He was having some test done, and I'd promised to be there. Then we got the case and I completely spaced it off. Haley came in just as I was leaving for the jet, and let me know how badly I'd screwed up."

"Oh." She could see how much the memory still hurt him. He actually did require just as much from himself as he did from those around him. As soon as he'd realized his mistake Penelope knew that he would have raked himself over the coals and not needed Haley to do it. But different people handled things in different ways. She said nothing more just reached across the table and threaded her fingers through his.

When he laughed she followed his eyes down to their entangled hands. "Uhg, so much for keeping it clean!"

"Yeah but you know what?" When she looked up at him, "You can call me honey any time," he winked.

"Well I guess I'll have to console myself with that." She said as she reached for a moist towelette, she had tried to sound annoyed but the mirth in her voice was evident.

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On the way back she noticed a for-sale sign and asked him to stop. Set back from the highway was a nice older home nestled in a very green area.

"You want to buy a house?" he questioned.

"Maybe." She walked around imagining all the potential of the quaint older home. Truthfully, it reminded her a bit of the home she'd grown up in, and of playing in the yard with her parents.

"Penelope, do you have any idea what comes along with owning a home? All the responsibilities? And with a house this old, probably a lot of repairs." He was trying to be the voice of reason, but it was a beautiful home on a large lot. It had a lot of potential and a lot of class.

She looked through a few windows and then was content to let him lead her back to the SUV to head back home. They were back in plenty of time to pick up Jack and the three of them played a half hour of ToonTown before bed.

Aaron could see that she'd turned a corner today. Her confidence and fragility seemed at much better levels than when she'd left work that morning. He wouldn't want to relive that afternoon not knowing where she was or if she was ok, but he was grateful for the outcome. Their date had been lighthearted and fun and helped them get to know each other better, and she'd been more at ease with him and Jack than she had been before.

Their lovemaking later was also more vibrant. If it had been spectacular before, he had no words to describe what it was that night.

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**So the episode referenced here is from Season 2 and Episode 4. Hotch had asked Garcia to run her "Digital Perspective Analysis Rendering" software to find every physical dimension of the Unsub, including height, waist size, inseam. To that she replied, "Honey, if he opens his mouth I'll give you the length of his teeth." **

**When I watched that episode I felt that Hotch's hostility for the Unsub was heightened by the guilt that he felt for missing Jack's appointment at the hospital for tests. Funny that we never heard anything further about Jack's "condition." It must have been not only treatable but curable? But I felt that Haley really put the guilt trip on Hotch and then played the martyr by telling him to go when he's offered to stay behind and not go on that case.**

**In my opinion it was that episode that was the beginning of the end of that marriage. Of course their was another where Jessica was visiting for Jack's first Birthday and there were obvious tensions when a case came up, not sure which episode that one was.**

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**Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter, it could get a bit angsty soon, but I promise an ending that you all will enjoy. :-)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

The rest of the week was uneventful. She'd seen her counselor that next morning who had been impressed with her improved outlook. Her frequency of visits had been reduced after that. She'd made inquiries into the house that they'd looked at and had been so much more her usual self at work that everything had gotten much more back to normal.

And then they'd gotten a case.

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"Live from Quantico,VA. It is the divine Miss Penelope. Los Angeles, you're our first and favorite caller, talk to me."

_Now that's my girl,_ Derek thought. _She seems back on top of the world. _"You know you're crazy right?" he smiled.

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Working with Reid, Penelope had been able to crack the case. She'd gotten an address to the unsub, and they'd been able to save the last girl just in a nick of time. On the plane ride home Hotch leaned his head back against the seat and closed his eyes, taking a break from the report he was filling out on his laptop. Penelope was truly amazing. He couldn't wait to get back home. He hadn't even been willing to wait for morning for them to take off. He'd just told the team not to come in to work until after lunch the next day.

The plane landed at around 12:15. He hadn't even waited to make sure everyone had a ride, he knew that Rossi could figure that out. He'd grabbed an SUV and headed straight home.

"What's with him?" Reid had questioned.

"Wants to get home to Jack I guess," Rossi answered and then started getting everyone organized into vehicles.

When Hotch got home, he slightly opened Jack's door. His son slept soundly and looked angelic with his little blonde head slightly lit up by the moonlight and streetlights that filtered in through the window. Hotch carefully closed the door and then went to his own room. He smiled as he saw that her hair had gone back to red. Her face was devoid of makeup but she still had her shiny lip balm on.

He quietly slipped out of his suit and slid between the sheets next to her. Warmth and comfort seemed to emanate from her and he basked in it as she shifted toward him, wrapping one arm around his mid section and snuggling close. He breathed in her scent. Strawberry soap, which blended into her and became something sweet and tempting and luscious. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath and let sleep claim him.

Weeks came and went and they hadn't had the talk about her moving, either back to her apartment nor anywhere else. They seemed content with the status quo.

Another case came up, in this one a female Unsub was preying upon vulnerable women. She stalked them, and made friends and acted helpful, then took them captive, made them subservient to her and tortured them if necessary to achieve that and when unsuccessful she would drown them.

This one affected Hotch. He thought about how Lynch had stalked Penelope, of how that whole situation might have turned out. With his musings came realization. His feelings for her were deep, very deep. This scared him. He knew all too well the agony of loss. And he wasn't sure he was ready to put himself out there like that again. He'd jumped into this 'relationship' with both feet, and eagerly so; yet now found himself back peddling.

What was he doing anyway, he didn't have what it took to nurture a relationship with a woman. Wasn't that why Haley left him? Eventually Penelope would too, might as well get it over with now before they all got too deep. He was a man committed to a cause, getting serial killers out of the general populous. That was him. He barely managed keeping up with Jack, how could he add a serious relationship into the mix. It was outrageous!

But what could he do? He couldn't ask her to leave, that was not a gentlemanly thing to do. He'd asked her there for God's sake. But he could make it her preference to leave. He hated that idea but he had nothing better. He sat down on the chair in his office and ran his hand over his face. How could he have allowed himself to get so far in. What had he been thinking? God the idea of hurting her was distasteful. But the thought of hurting her in the same way that he'd hurt Haley was completely unthinkable. And not that he could admit it to himself, but idea that he could be hurt in some way was his real driving force; the thought of her succumbing to some kind of tragic accident or illness or the thought of her leaving him when he wasn't prepared for it or expecting it.

He buried that line of thought, this was for her own good, not his. He stayed late at work that night, even though he'd completed his report on the plane ride home. He'd have to be creative from this point. Staying away from home was one thing, but he couldn't have her keep being responsible for Jack, he needed to buffer that relationship as soon as possible. He knew that Jack was far too attached to her already.

The next several weeks were filled with Father/Son nights, late office hours, and cases away where Jessica was enlisted to watch Jack. Jessica had tried to question him about it but had been rebuffed. Penelope had explained how much she loved watching Jack, only to be told that he wasn't her responsibility. And finally after a myriad of carefully planned abandonments, she was gone. He came home after a case to find everything of hers gone and her key to his apartment on the table with no note.

It was what he'd wanted, but getting it didn't garner the satisfaction nor the relief that he'd assumed it would. He felt as though his entire world had crashed. He walked over and poured himself a glass of scotch. One glass turned into two, three, four… finally the numbness took over and he slept.

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**Sad I know, but everyone will come right in the end. Just trust that it will, I'll try to update a little quicker since I have written chapters ahead. Did anyone recognize the case that I mentioned there? The female unsub? That episode had Corbin Bernsen in it! He sure looked different then back on LA Law huh?**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Penelope was glad she'd checked into the house further. Of course she'd known that this thing couldn't last. She'd wanted to go with it while it did last though and it had been lovely. She'd seen when it had started to fall apart, she'd watched it with terror and devastation. What hurt her deepest was that she knew she'd be cut out of Jack's life altogether now. At least before it had been nice to have his sometimes smiling, sometimes serious, and always thoughtful and brilliant personality in her life.

She'd stayed as long as she could that last case, but she knew she had to be out before Aaron came home. She regretted that she didn't have a chance to say goodbye to Jack. But there was little she could do about it. She had loaded all of her things into her new car (there had been no saving Ester) and headed to her new home. She knew she could count on Morgan to help her move the rest from her old apartment.

She'd thought about leaving a note when she'd walked out of Hotch's apartment for the last time, but really what was there to say? Better to just leave things the way they were, that way words couldn't turn bitter and mar the beautiful memory she would have. She knew that she'd fallen hopelessly in love with him, but she knew she could live with that too.

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"Baby Girl, what made you decide to buy a house? You know you're gonna have a longer commute now."

"Don't I know it my Chocolate Romeo, but it beckoned to me and I was helpless to withstand it's call."

"Then why is it that you don't seem so ecstatic about your new acquisition here? I would think you'd be throwing a big party to celebrate."

How would she respond to that? … "Yeah well, I think I have more of an intimate relationship with this dwelling. It reminds me of my parents, a cherished memory and I want to savor it quietly. Now if you're done profiling me, you could help me with that box of dishes there that's just a bit too heavy."

"Touché Mama." He gave her one of his usually grins and carried the box into the kitchen for her. He didn't know what had shifted, but he was glad to be back in the circle of her preferred company once more. She was like his territory and he'd felt shut out the last few months.

He helped her unpack lots of things and helped her with a few new purchases as well. He'd assembled the new outdoor grill she'd bought, and hung her porch swing for her. She'd planted some flowers and he'd laid garden stones for a patio out back.

He could tell that she loved her new home, but he could also see that she wasn't happy, but hey… she hadn't been happy for a year, it was probably just missing Lynch, but thank God that freak show was out of the picture forever, she'd get back to normal given time.

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Hotch was miserable. He hated the way things were. Pen barely spoke to him at work, it was strictly on a have to basis. He avoided her too, at all costs. Seeing her made him feel empty and hollow. Seeing the brightness gone from her beautiful brown eyes made him feel more guilty than he could imagine, which in turn made him angry. Hurting her hadn't been his goal.

Going home held no joy for him, and his son was having trouble with the change. Jack seemed to hate every meal, every activity, and refused to play ToonTown as they'd made a practice of doing, saying that it wasn't the same. Hotch had actually found Jack's favorite book _Salt & Pepper_ in the toilet one night.

And the really annoying thing was Morgan's smug attitude at work. He was pretty sure that Pen… Garcia hadn't divulged information about their relationship to him, but he knew that Morgan must be spending a lot of time with her and God help him, he was jealous as he could be of that.

He needed to get his mind on something, anything. There was a triathlon for the bureau coming up, maybe that would help to get his mind on something positive. He'd already moped around for three weeks. It was time to do something.

He'd made the mistake of telling Dave about the girl he'd met while training. He hadn't been interested in the slightest but Dave was in the rah rah cheering section for her, so he'd rolled with it. Beth was nice, confident, and just a bit pushy. She could be a fun flirtation, not someone he could fall for, which made her safe. Each time he'd looked at her, he'd been reminded of everything that she wasn't though... She wasn't a bit like Penny.

Somewhere inside he'd known that stringing her along wasn't fair, but it had helped mask his true feelings and other than feeling like a fraud, it gave him relief that no one would uncover his true feelings. He'd felt extremely sad but defensive at the end of his race when Penelope had been so quiet and distant. He'd given all his attention to Jack and Beth. Penny had walked away early. It felt like cheating, but he'd plastered a smile on, and since his smiles were rare no one knew how false it was.

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Pen hated being at the triathlon, if she hadn't spent the previous evening with the girls she would have begged off being sick. She was sick in fact, the whole thought of being there and seeing him had her stomach in a turmoil. She'd thrown up 3 times that morning. But she'd be damned if she'd let this situation get the best of her. Somehow, she'd nursed only one drink the whole night before. Not that she wouldn't have liked to get blitzed, it's just that she'd been afraid of running her mouth in a drunken stupor and spilling it about her and Hotch.

So why then did she feel like she was utterly and truly hung over? Thank God Derek had stuck right by her side that day. And when that woman had shown up, all thin and perfect and grinning like a Cheshire cat, it was all she could handle and she'd walked away. How she'd kept from breaking down she never knew. By the time that Derek had caught up with her she'd explained that she was too hung over and feeling awful and she fled to the comfort of her new refuge.

She'd dreaded having to see him on Monday, but thank the gods, there had been a case and after a brief conference in which she could focus mainly on her power-point they'd all left and she was blessedly alone again.

Even with the solitude and slight peace of mind that it allowed she'd remained feeling sick though. And every time she'd heated food in the microwave and opened the door on it to smell the popcorn smell that lingered in it she'd had to make a mad dash to the restroom.

After a week of that, and the added stress of the team being back, she'd finally gone to the doctor. This had to be a gall bladder thing or something. She was non-plussed to find out however that there was a much more basic reason for the nausea. Oh God, how could she have been so stupid?

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**I know, we all hate angst right? I'll try to get you all through it as quickly as I can. Sorry if its torture but... well just keep remembering that I love happy endings, so how could I possibly let this story go south and stay there?**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Hotch was not so much shocked as annoyed when he found the request for transfer on his desk. He knew he'd made working with him a chore, but part of that had been to help Penelope to move on. The thought of her leaving though… he hated the idea. While seeing her almost every day was hard, the thought of not seeing her seemed unbearable. Not only that, she had a real rapport with the team and they all depended on her. Most cases would result in more casualties or ongoing investigation were it not for her incredible skills in finding information.

Not only was she requesting a transfer, she wanted to transfer to Denver? Why not just a different part of this office, hadn't she just bought a house?

Dreading the confrontation, he walked to her office.

After hearing his knock she answered with, "The Goddess is in, enter and make your request known."

Inside he couldn't help a slight smile which he quickly covered, even though it wasn't said with her usual effervescence, it was still totally her, but his stoic mask would never show it. "Garcia, I've read your request for transfer." He could see her stiffen at the sound of his voice, and he felt as though cold fingers squeezed inside his chest.

She was unwilling to sit there like some pathetic pining waif. She turned in her chair and looked him straight in the eye. "Yes."

"I can't approve it. I believe I know what's behind it and I'd leave before I let you leave. If you're serious about this I'll go to Strauss now and ask for reassignment, but this team needs you. You belong here." He said the entire thing with the serious expression that everyone was used to seeing on him.

It wasn't what she was expecting, she'd been expecting the approved form to appear in her inbox, no fuss no muss. But this confrontation and ultimatum thing… she couldn't let him leave his post. She figured that as time went on she'd have to just quit and then find another job at a great enough distance that he or the team wouldn't learn of her predicament. She was not however going to engage him in conversation. She just stared at him and gave a slight nod.

He couldn't figure what to make of her silence. She was not the silent type. "Garcia, I am sorry."

Oh now that was really too much, she did have her pride after all. "Sorry for what? You were there when I needed someone, I was there to get you back into the dating scene. It was a win/win. I was just hoping to find a job with somewhat more regular hours. But hey, if the team needs me then I'm here. But I really need to get back to work if there's nothing else." She then tipped her head to the side. He'd think that was her questioning signal, in fact it was to mask the fact that she was fighting bile which would overcome her in a minute if he didn't leave.

"No that's all, thank you for staying," he said as he turned and left.

He was barely two steps out the door when she pulled her wastepaper basket close and heaved her lunch into it.

She'd seen precious little of him after that, that was, until after the bank-robbery a month and a half later.

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They'd all met at Rossi's soiree. She'd had such an overload of emotions when she'd heard about the surprise wedding. She was excited for her friend, but her own emotions the last few days had been a roller coaster to say the least. She'd lost weight and gained baby weight, so the team was still none the wiser and now she was four and a half months along. When she'd stood talking with Morgan and Prentiss, neither of them knew she was dying inside, Prentiss was obviously distracted with some personal dilemma, Morgan was concentrating on whatever that was, and when Hotch walked up with Beth on his arm Penelope had all but reached her breaking point.

They'd all been so preoccupied that no one but Hotch saw the way that she rushed off when he walked in. Everyone else chalked it up to her eccentricity. She knew from the moment she saw him walk in here with Beth that she couldn't continue to do this another day. This party would be her farewell to all of them. She made sure to dance with all of them that night, even the girls. They'd done the typical group dance and she'd hugged them, every last one, even Hotch. Jack had been a bit standoffish, so she'd shook his hand (which he seemed to allow) and then she'd hugged her godson and left the party.

It had seemed strange to Hotch that she'd hugged him. When she'd pulled away it had taken every bit of his strength not to pull her back to him and beg her forgiveness and take her home with him. But months had passed now and it was all over with. He felt so empty. Far emptier than he had when Haley had been killed. He'd excused himself to the men's room and wept. How could he possibly have thought this was the right thing to do? This was self inflicted torture. He felt the cold fingers squeezing in his chest again and was on the verge of collapse when Rossi came in.

"Whoa there, what…" he helped a doubled over Aaron who was gripping his chest and weeping to right himself. "You want to tell me what's going on here?"

Hotch pulled himself up straight and donned his serious mask. "I think I've been working too hard."

"No, not buying it. I practically invented profiling, try again." Rossi wasn't going to give an inch here and Hotch knew it.

Hotch turned and ran some cold water, splashed it on his face and then grabbed a towel and patted his face dry. "I'm the most incredible liar. I've denied myself what I want, no what I need to be happy. I've strung a woman along that I have really no desire to be with. I've let you encourage me in that when it was really the last thing in the world I wanted. And I have pushed away the one person that I want most in my life. And now I am the most miserable bastard the world has probably ever seen."

Rossi was a bit taken aback. That's not what he thought this was about. He had thought that Hotch had watched the wedding and was thinking of asking Beth and was having anxiety about it in light of what he'd been through in the past. "So let me get this straight. You aren't in love with the brunette out there? You're saying you don't even want to be with her?"

"I don't. I spent two of the best months of my life with a woman that I adore and then I pretended to be preoccupied because my feelings scared me to death." Aaron took a deep breath, it was the first time he'd really admitted it, without excuse or façade even to himself.

"I see, and now you're hiding out in the restroom having an anxiety attack over it?" Rossi stood there staring at him. "Jack can stay with me tonight, you need to fix this."

Aaron nodded. He took several deep breaths and went back to the party. He spotted Jack with Henry and went to speak to him first. "Hey Buddy, can we talk for a minute?"

"Sure Daddy." Jack followed him a few feet away.

Bending down to his son's level he began, "I wondered if you could do Daddy a favor. I have some business to take care of, could you stay with your Uncle Dave tonight and let Daddy take care of some important stuff?"

Jack looked thoughtful, as though this was a matter he'd have to think over. Then lightening his expression he looked at his father and nodded, "Sure Daddy, take all the time you need."

Aaron stifled a smile, "Thank you buddy." He kissed his son's forehead. "I sure do love you."

"I love you too Daddy. Can I go play with Henry now?"

"Of course you can son," he replied.

_Now, to talk to Beth_. He spotted her dancing with Morgan. He held himself back from cutting in. He couldn't do that just to tell her where things stood.

When the song ended she sought him out, smiling as she walked his way. By the time she'd reached him however her smile had faded. "What is it?"

"I really need to talk to you."

"Sure."

"Do you mind if we go for a drive?" he asked. He really had no desire to make a spectacle at his friend's wedding.

"Ok."

As they drove she felt more and more uneasy about the conversation. "You're taking me home." It was a statement not a question.

"Yes." He pulled up in front of her apartment building.

"I don't understand."

"Neither did I until tonight." He took a deep breath. This would be hard… "Beth, I've been pushing myself along in this dating thing. I thought it was time that I moved on. I think you're a beautiful, confident woman with a lot to offer. But my heart isn't in this. I'm so sorry. I realized tonight though that I can't keep pushing myself to feel something I don't and it's extremely unfair to you to let you think…" Another deep breath. "I'm sorry to do this, very sorry. I'm sorry that I've been such a fraud and sorry that I may have put you in a vulnerable situation. You really deserve better than this."

She looked at him, "Well to say I was shocked would be an understatement. But only shocked that it happened now and not a few weeks ago. I thought I could tease and chide and win you over, but I have seen since the beginning that you're heart wasn't in it." She reached over and kissed his cheek. "I'm sorry that my powers of persuasion didn't win out in this case. I am disappointed that _this_ didn't work out." She pointed her finger back and forth between the two of them. "Should you change your mind, you know how to contact me." Then she reached the door handle and exited the vehicle with her head held high, and a swing to her hips as if to show him what he'd missed out on.

Of course he wasn't even looking, his mind already on how to formulate his apology to Penny. God, he needed her to know how deeply he regretted the last few months.

Though he'd never been to her home since she'd moved in, he knew his way there blindfolded.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Hotch pulled up in Garcia's driveway but saw no signs of life. Her car wasn't in the driveway, perhaps it was in the old garage. He went and looked in the window of the older detached garage, but it there was no vehicle inside. He wondered where she might have gone at this time of night. She couldn't be with one of the team, they had all still been at the wedding party when he left. He noticed the porch swing and sat on it, he'd wait it out.

Highway sounds had awakened him, he looked at his watch, 3 a.m. She'd not come home yet. He was starting to worry. He wanted to text one of the team, but to bring attention to the situation before they'd had a chance to talk wouldn't be fair to her. The chill of the twilight hours began to get to him and so he went to wait in his car. When dawn came and still no Penelope, he felt very low. With nothing more to do, he went to Dave's to retrieve his son.

"So how'd it go?"

"It didn't, She wasn't at home. I waited, but she never returned."

"I see," said Dave pouring his friend a cup of coffee. "So you think she's found someone else?"

Actually that thought had not occurred to him and he was devastated at the thought. "I guess that's possible. She'd quite a woman. A man would count himself very fortunate to have her. And unlike me, would probably never dream of throwing it away." Aaron took a sip of the hot and bitter liquid. "How was Jack?"

"Jack was and is great as always." Then taking a drink, swallowing and then looking up, "Says he's worried about you though, that you haven't been doing too good. He says you're angry a lot, and never really happy since Miss Penny moved out. Could that be our Penny? Penelope?"

"Yeah, it could. She never came home from the party Dave. I'm looking back on the evening and she was emotional from the time I showed up there with Beth. She hugged me last night. It's the first voluntary acknowledgement of my existence since she moved out. And I'm worried… I let this go for so long… Something's was going on with her tonight." His fist slammed the counter. "I should have held on to her when she hugged me. I should have told her what a ass I've been. God I've just screwed this up so damn bad." He hung his head.

"Well I'd just like to know when the hell she moved in with you and when she moved out. I thought I could read things but this… this blindsided me."

"When that thing with Lynch happened. That prick was trying to bash my head in. He was pissed that she was with me."

"And why was she with you?" Rossi questioned.

"Now that was innocent," Aaron defended. "I'd been making a video for Jack, of Haley. Somehow I screwed that up too, almost lost every video and digital picture that existed. Pen came over to recover it for us."

"I see."

"Then that Lynch business happened. She was upset I was afraid for her to drive, we both fell asleep on the couch."

"Go on," Rossi prodded.

"Well the next day I took her to the police station to give a statement, that's how we discovered the stalking. After the cameras were recovered from her apartment she wouldn't go back there. I told her to stay with us for a week until she had enough time to get her head together and see how she really felt. In the mean time… things just happened."

"So she just stayed a week? Jack made it sound like longer."

"It was longer. She stayed around two months. And then some kind of fear kicked in and I acted like my feelings had changed until I got home from a case and she was gone; lock, stock, and barrel." Aaron put his head back and closed his eyes, "I'm such an asshole. Neither of us ever brought it up again until a few weeks ago when she requested a transfer."

"She requested a transfer?" Rossi was surprised by this.

"She wanted to move to the Denver field office. I denied it, told her I'd leave the BAU before I'd let her leave, so she dropped it."

"Did she?" Dave's question hung in the air.

Aaron went in and laid on the sofa, waiting for Jack to get up. But his anxiety over Penelope was increasing. As Dave walked by he called out, "Did she dance with you? At the party last night, did she dance with you?"

Dave stopped. "Yeah, she danced with everyone." And then Dave's speech slowed. "Even. The. Girls."

"What did she say to you? When you danced, did she talk?"

Dave knew where this was headed and it wasn't good. "She did Aaron. She said that getting to know me had been more of a pleasure than she'd initially thought after she'd been shot. She was glad she'd given me the benefit of the doubt. She said I was a great guy and she was glad to have me in her family."

"Is that all?" Hotch felt sick to his stomach, he knew this was bad.

"She hugged me after the dance. Aaron I think she hugged everyone after she danced with them. I didn't think that much about it at the time. It seemed natural with the girls, the dynamic was changing. Something's up with Emily, JJ just got married, she's always hugging Morgan. I'd thrown the party, I thought it was a thank-you hug kinda thing. I probably should have rethought it thought when she hugged Reid, I never saw her hug you."

"My instinct was to hold onto her, I should have followed my instincts." Hotch sounded really defeated now. "Dave, if my suspicions are right… Could you check?"

"If you're wrong you don't want to get caught going through her things?"

"If she were to catch me in her house without being invited… I'd never have a prayer of fixing this. If there is any kind of remote chance."

"What's the address?"

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Dave was sure he'd find a key around the front of the house. Sure enough there was a pocket on the underside of the swing cushion that held a key. He'd of course knocked several times before going that route. He let himself in and smiled at the colorful furniture. He looked in the kitchen and saw that the trash was empty, nothing in there that might give her thought process away.

He opened the fridge to find it completely empty, not a morsel of food in it. He made his way to the bedrooms and found what he assumed to be hers. The drawers were mostly empty, the closet with only a few clothing items left. It was as they had feared. Their Penelope was gone.

As he left the property he saw that the trash can was by the road, and as he'd thought, the former contents of the refrigerator were in it. He dreaded informing his friend, but he could certainly see Penny's point of view. The last few months had probably been killing her. She was a woman with a big heart but a lot of sensitivity to go along with it. His friend had run over her as surely as if he'd been driving a steam roller.

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"What did you find?" Hotch was on him as soon as he'd come through the door.

Dave wasn't eager for this conversation. He didn't want to judge his friend, he knew Aaron was going through a hell of his own making. He walked in and practically fell into a chair. "She'd gone Aaron, and she's not coming back anytime soon if at all. She completely emptied her refrigerator and freezer. She emptied the garbage cans and put everything by the street, and she's taken most of her clothing."

"She did the same thing with the apartment. And she never went back." He covered his face with his hands. "Oh my God, how could I have let this happen?"

"I don't know Aaron," Rossi responded.

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**Please hang in there, this will all come right in a few chapters. I promise!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Monday came and Penelope was of course a no show. Derek was uptight he'd tried calling her several times. JJ was worried, it wasn't like her friend not to show up and not to call. Everyone seemed a bit frantic except Reid.

They all gathered in the conference room. Hotch wasn't sure what to say to the group, his guilt was paralyzing. Derek wanted this to be the next case. He was ready for him, Prentiss and JJ to go scope out her house, he had a key after all.

Dave tried to be the voice of reason, "I think there is no foul play here Morgan. I'm recalling Garcia's behavior at the party the other night and something was off. I think she hugged us all goodbye."

"What? That's ridiculous man." Derek was irritated.

"Is it?" Rossi questioned.

"Man she hugs me all the time. It means nothing."

"She hugs you, she doesn't hug me all the time. But she did the other night." Rossi pointed out.

"She hugged me," JJ said. "But I just got married, it was a congratulatory hug."

David piped up again. "Reid, did you get a congratulatory hug too?"

Reid seemed reluctant to talk, but nodded affirmatively.

"Prentiss? Hotch?"

They both nodded, Hotch feeling a fraud.

"Why would she do that? She just bought a house for God's sake." Morgan was fuming.

Hotch spoke up then, "The point is that she's missing. We're her family, we need to find her."

Morgan could certainly agree with that. "I'm with Hotch, we need to find Penelope."

They all agreed but Reid. "I think if she left on her own we should leave her alone, she has her reasons."

"What reasons?" Hotch asked, he'd zoned in on the fact that Reid knew something.

"Just reasons. They're probably personal."

"Reid you know something." Hotch prodded.

"Maybe." Reid kept his head down.

"Reid if you know something you need to tell us. Do you know where she is?" Morgan asked.

"No, I don't know where she is."

"What do you know?" Hotch practically yelled.

"It's none of your business, if she wanted everyone to know she would have announced it."

JJ walked over to Reid putting her hand on his shoulder. "Reid, Garcia is our family, she's like a sister. If she's in turmoil, she shouldn't have to go through that alone. We should be there, you and me and all of us, to bear that burden with her."

Reid kept his head down. "I feel like if you all cared so much you would have been paying more attention to her."

"Reid," Morgan's voice had gotten lower. "Man I've been trying to be with her. I've been at her house working every weekend."

"Great, then you noticed how emotional she is, how she cries every time she thinks no one's looking. You obviously know that she's been throwing up every day and hasn't seemed to lose any weight. You've seen the way she rubs and pats her abdomen. You noticed of course that she's had more out of the office appointments than usual and you've walked in while she's been looking at the odd shaped string of paper that she slams in her desk drawer trying to hide when someone walks into her office… You're so on top of it, you've been by her side, you noticed right?"

The rest of the team stood there with mouths gaping open.

Dave seemed to find his voice first. "Are you saying that Garcia is pregnant?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying," Reid yelled. "She's pregnant and all of you who claim to love her so much didn't care enough to notice."

Reid was ready to leave the room, exasperated by his co-workers. But Hotch stopped him, "Reid, did you confirm your suspicious with Garcia?"

Realization seemed to dawn on Reid and he glared back at Hotch. He had gotten so angry however that it went unnoticed by everyone but Rossi. "Sort of, I told her that I was there for her to talk to, to lean on and that I already had some experience with being a god-father."

"And what was her response?" Hotch prodded further.

"She said, 'Thank you Sweetness, but I want to keep my personal business personal for the time being'."

"Thank you Reid," Hotch said with his typical seriousness. He then turned and exited the conference room.

Rossi sat down with the group and tried to get them to start brainstorming, but Reid still in a turmoil followed Hotch out into the hall.

Reid modified his tone and quietly asked, "You're the father aren't you?"

Hotch stopped and turned back to Reid, he was wearing the best poker face he knew as he asked, "Why would you ask that?"

"Penelope and I have been friends for a long time. I know more than you think. I know that she had this silly way of flirtatious communication. I know that she thinks that Derek really is great looking but she loves him more like a brother. I know that he's her best friend but when she needs to confide something highly personal that he's the last person she'd confide in. I know that she loves the rest of us, probably too much sometimes. I also know that she idolizes you. I know that she thinks that your nothing but good to the core of your being and that her whole world was shaken because of all the things that have happened to you." Reid took a breath and continued with his voice starting to break as he whispered, "I know that she was ecstatically happy for a couple of months there, happier than I had ever seen her, and then suddenly she was shy and withdrawn again. I know that she's pregnant and she felt so awkward about it that she's run away."

"Reid…" Hotch wanted to come clean right there, perhaps he'd have to in the end, but would doing so now violate Penelope in some way? He needed to think. He pulled his cell phone from his pocket as though it had vibrated, and pretended to check a message. "I'll be in my office."

Hotch closed his office door behind him and leaned against it where he couldn't be seen through the window. Running his hands into his hair and grabbing fist-fulls on each side of his head. It was all he could do to blink back the moisture that was filling his eyes. _Dear God, what have I done?_ It was bad enough that he had hurt Penelope, but now she was gone, she had no one, and she was carrying his child.

Had he not felt a determination to find her before he would have felt it now. His feeling now was a kind of frenzied desperation. This was a much different feeling than when they were on a case, racing against the clock to save a victim. Penelope was most likely in no imminent danger. No what was at risk here was something much different. His sanity and her future, all the hope that he'd ever held for happiness or peace of mind, all rested with finding her.

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Please continue to hang on, I'll have our couple reunited very soon.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Three weeks later they'd made zero progress in locating their much loved friend. JJ had looked into every place that Garcia had ever talked about living or visiting. Morgan had spoken to her every neighbor or acquaintance. They'd had a bureau TA try to track credit cards, vehicles, property and medical records. They were even unable to locate what OB/GYN that she'd visited before she left. She was one of the top hackers in the world for goodness sake, she'd covered her every base. They even checked to see if she had put her house on the market, but the house was not for sale and the deed showing ownership belonged to one Jackson Bentley Hotchner. Hotch knew that it wasn't her intention, but she did proven to be a master in heaping guilt on a person. She'd left and given her house to his son. He'd barely been able to conceal that fact from the team.

It seemed that currently their only hope was Reid figuring out what she would use as a new name. But then Rossi had an idea.

"Hotch," Hotch looked up to see Rossi leaning into his office through the open door.

"Dave, what's up?"

"I have a hunch."

"Come in and close the door." Hotch waved his friend to the chair in front of his desk.

Obliging Rossi closed the door and sat. "Garcia is a sentimental loving girl, she considers us her family."

"Ok."

"It isn't that she doesn't want to ever see any of us again, she just doesn't want to be seen. I think she's close by Hotch. She could be anywhere in the country or even abroad, but I don't think she'd do that. She's done it before and she was never as happy as she was here. And another thing… I think if anything were to go wrong, she'd want you close by."

Hotch leaned back in his chair, and a single tear slipped from one eye. Even in with the way he'd failed her, he knew Rossi was right. Her loving nature would keep her close by, knowing that she or the child might need him one day and being forgiving enough to turn to him should she need to.

"Thank you Dave, I think I've got this."

He looked down and prepared a personal ad that would run in the papers of all the surrounding area.

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Penelope had checked in on her family via satellite photos and city cams periodically. But she'd begun to have problems seeing Hotch. She'd assumed that he was spending more time with Beth and had scoped out her residence, yet there was no sign of Hotch or Jack there either.

She'd looked in on JJ and Morgan several times. She really wished that she would have taken JJ into her confidence, yet she knew that JJ was quite loyal to Hotch and might have given her secret away with good intentions. She just couldn't hold onto the man she adored that way, she wanted more than anything for him to be happy. If his happiness meant that he should be with Beth, then so be it.

Still she would like to keep an eye on them. She finally resolved to tap into the city cams. She watched as Hotch picked up Jack from after-school daycare, and then headed in the opposite direction of his apartment. _That's strange, where is he going? _As she continued to watch, she missed the switch of city cams and lost them. _What's wrong with you Garcie? You are seriously slowing down girl._ She looked up at the clock in her new family complex apartment in Ellicott City. It was almost 7p.m. now and she'd barely eaten at lunch. No wonder she was reacting slow.

Normally she avoided meat in her diet or at least limited it, but with this pregnancy she found herself craving steaks and hamburgers, heck, she even carried around Slim Jims in her purse lately. This kid must be a carnivore.

She was trying to eat healthy however so fixed herself a turkey burger and some veggies and sat down to eat. She perused the funnies from the daily newspaper as she ate, and then for giggles she read the personals. That's when she found it…

_Dear Rainmaker,_

_I'm soaked with tears. I'd never loved like that before. I've been a fool consumed by fear. I understand if you say no, but please forgive me. Each day, without you is torture. I thought I knew agony until you left. Please. Jack and I... we need you back._

'Rainmaker'... was it a message from him?But the reference to Jack made it clear. Still, could she trust that? She so wanted to. She longed for someone to share this experience with. She needed a day or two to think about it.

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"Come on man, you figured Foyet's alias out in a couple of hours."

"Morgan I appreciate where you're coming from, but Foyet was a methodical psychotic, Garcia is just… Garcia."

"Reid?" Hotch called down from the office level. "Can I see you in my office?"

Morgan rolled his eyes. Hotch had certainly been weird with Penelope, both before she disappeared and after. He couldn't quite put his finger on it. Some strange friendship he guessed. Or maybe it was some kind of paternal protectiveness. He was too old for Garcia and she was certainly not his type. She wasn't a thing like Haley or that chick that was in New York.

Reid drug himself up to Hotch's office. He knew that Hotch wanted the same thing Morgan did, and he just didn't know. "Look Hotch, I know you want me to pull Garcia's alias out of a hat for you but I just don't know."

"I think we've been over thinking this. Reid you've been in Garcia's car before?"

"Yeah, she took me out a couple of times. She was really proud of that car. But I think it blew a gasket or something."

"She calls the new car Rita... Reid, did she have a name for the old one? Because, I never heard it if she did." Hotch felt like he was really on to something here.

"Yeah she had a name for it, she called it Ester." Reid recalled her trying to take him out the first time to cheer him up, and introducing him to her car.

"Ester, thank you Reid, thank you." Hotch immediately picked up his phone and called the TA they had been using. "Yeah, try Ester Bauer. Look for medical records. I think there would be a pregnancy being monitored here in Virginia."

"You do! Give me everything!" Hotch slammed down the telephone and ran from the office.

As it turned out, they were able to determine that Penelope had an appointment the next afternoon with her doctor, and Hotch intended to be there.

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_Does everything really happen for a reason? Or are we just out there? Being the best person we can and doing all that we can to make the world a better place?_ As time goes on Penelope thinks that's what it is.

Finally showing a round tummy she marched into her doctor's office in her stretchy capris and a brightly colored oversized t-shirt. She flounced in trying to be cheery, when in fact she was in turmoil. She knew the ad she'd read several days before was meant for her, and she wanted to respond but was afraid.

Once she'd checked in at the desk she turned around to find a seat when she spotted him. His face was filled with anxiety, and her heart would have broken had it not been for the ridiculous shirt he wore.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

She didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so she did both. Their sat the love of her life in jeans and a white t-shirt that with rainbow lettering on it which read:

My heart belongs to:

Penelope Garcia

Ester Bauer

Rainmaker

Fount of all knowledge

Supreme Genius

Empress

Enchantress

Oracle

Goddess Divine

He rose to his feet and walked toward her. He stopped without touching her and said, "Pen, I have no right to ask, but can you forgive me. I love you so much."

She had no words, she just wrapped her arms around him and let him hold her close.

"Oh thank God, I was so afraid you'd send my sorry ass packing." He then began to choke up a bit. "I came looking for you the night of JJ's wedding. I wanted to set things right, to explain, but by the time I reached your home it was too late. I spent the night on your porch swing waiting for you to come back."

"Ester Bauer?" a nurse called.

"That's me," she pulled back to look at him.

Unsure of what to do or what to say, he pulled his lips tight and responded with, "I'll wait here."

Penelope turned and walked toward the nurse holding the door, then biting her lip she turned back. "Aaron," she said, holding out her hand to him.

His head had hung low as she'd walked away, but seeing her hand held out to him he felt overwhelmed with emotion. With no words he took her hand and walked with her to an exam room. The nurse eyed his shirt with a smirk and took them to the exam room.

The doctor when she entered had also been taken aback by the shirt but decided not to mention it. All the while Penelope seeing their reactions couldn't help but smile a bit.

All seemed well in the exam until they listened for the heartbeat.

"I can hear your little girl moving around in there Ester, but I can't quite find her heartbeat. Would you have time for a quick ultrasound just as a precautionary measure?"

"Sure," Penelope responded with a of concern evident in her voice. Without even being conscious of it she reached for Aaron's hand and he took it and gave it a squeeze.

"I'm sure everything is fine," the doctor tried to reassure her, "as I said, I can hear her moving around. I'd just rather error on the side of caution."

"Ok." Penelope said.

"I'll have a technician come for you, just wait here." And the doctor exited.

"Should I be worried?" she looked up at Aaron.

"Not until there is something to worry about," he responded. "So, a girl huh?" he smiled.

She could see the affection and awe in his expression, she'd had the same felt exactly the same when she'd found out she was pregnant and then again when she'd found out the sex of the baby. She simply smiled in her response and shook her head.

Knock, knock, knock.

"Come in," Penelope called out.

"Ms. Bauer? Are you ready? We'll be moving just down the hall here."

Aaron continued to hold her hand as she stepped down off the examining table and followed the technician out the door and down the hall. He felt privileged, not only to be here with her but in the fact that she would reach out to him for comfort and support.

"Here we are, go ahead and close the door behind you," the tech said as she sat down and began to prepare her machine.

Obviously, Penelope had done this before as she lowered the waistband of her capri pants and lifted her t-shirt to expose her mid section. Aaron backed up toward the wall choosing a position to see the screen while staying out of the way.

"This will be cold as I'm sure you already know," the tech said as she squirted the gel on Penelope's abdomen.

"Oh yes, I've done this a couple of times already."

Aaron wasn't sure what to feel, not only had he found Penelope again, but she seemed to be very forgiving. Now here he was seeing her belly exposed, and in spite of the situation, he was quelling the desire to run his hand over her bare skin.

As the tech maneuvered the wand around on Penelope and image appeared on the screen. "Here we are. Let me just get some sound going."

She turned a dial and the sound of the baby's heartbeat filled the room.

"Oh," Penelope softly cried "That's the most beautiful sound."

Aaron reached down and wiped the tear from the corner of her eye and kissed her forehead, then looked at the screen and the image of his unborn daughter.

"This is one active girl you have here Ms. Bauer." The tech said.

"Don't I know it!" Penelope giggled. "I don't think she ever sleeps."

Aaron couldn't help but think of all the time and experiences he's missed so far.

"Well just as we thought, everything seems to look right on schedule here," the tech removed the wand and handed Penelope a towel to wipe away the gel. "I'll just ask the doctor when she wants to see you again."

As the tech stepped out Aaron sat down in a chair, buried his face in his hands. He felt shame for the way that he'd pushed this rare and unique woman out of his life. He'd come so close to losing her and this baby that was now so real to him. Hearing the rapid heartbeat and watching her move around on the screen stirred his heart in a profound way.

Penelope sat up and placed her hand on his arm. He looked up at her, his eyes wet. "I am so sorry. I was so afraid of being left, I left first. Jack has been so upset and confused and look what I might have missed out on. Can you ever forgive me?" He looked up into her face.

She placed a hand on his arm, "Why don't we get out of here and talk," she suggested.

She could hear the tech outside her door and popped her head out. "Excuse me, but when should I schedule my next appointment?"

"Oh I'm sorry Ms. Bauer, about 4 weeks will be fine."

Looking back at Aaron she inclined her head toward the door and he followed her as she booked her next appointment and they walked out together.

"You want to follow me?" she inquired.

"No. I want to ride with you, or you with me." He grabbed her hands and lowered his head.

Releasing one hand from his grip she touched his face. "Aaron, I wasn't exactly running for my life you know. I just thought you wanted nothing to do with us and I didn't want to upset the team. I know you have a moratorium on profiling each other but you all do it anyway. Someone would have figured the situation out. I had to leave. That doesn't' mean I am going to run away now though. You're here and you seem to want to work this situation out."

He covered her hand on his cheek and moved it to kiss her palm. "I can't believe you're being so forgiving. I know I don't deserve it, but I'm grateful."

"Aaron, come on, let's get in the car. I need some air conditioning. Somehow my thermostat seems to be stuck on high lately. I can't believe how hot it still is for mid September."

He got into her small lime green SUV. She started the engine and turned on the air. "My apartment isn't far. How much time do you have?" she asked him.

"I'm not going back today Pen, not even if they get a case. Rossi and Morgan can handle it."

"Alright then." She buckled her seat belt and backed out of the parking space and headed toward the place that she'd been trying to call home for the last few weeks. It was a place to be, but in her heart she knew that the only homes she'd had was with her two families, her parents and then her family at the BAU.

"It's nice here," Hotch commented as she pulled into the apartment complex.

"I thought so," she replied.

"Do you think you might want to come back home though?" he still wasn't clear on her reasons for running other than the fact that he'd hurt her so terribly.

She looked at him blankly, "Of course. I only really left to protect you. Well… and so that I wouldn't have to witness you forging a future with the so skinny and perfect Beth." She lowered her eyes during the last part.

"Pen," he sighed realizing how much he'd wounded her. "The reason I dated Beth is because she was someone that I couldn't form any lasting feelings for." He covered his eyes knowing how bad it sounded. "I know it sounds horrible but, I was afraid of being vulnerable to someone, namely you. So I went out with Beth because I knew she was someone I would never love."

Penelope pulled out a chair from her tiny dinette and indicated for him to take the other seat. "Aaron, I don't understand. I mean I know Haley's death was horrible, but it's not as though our unsubs find our personal information all the time. That was one freaky fluke. I have worked overtime; believe me, making sure that it won't happen again."

"I know that…"

"Then tell me what it is." She prodded. She couldn't imagine returning home if he couldn't tell her why things had unraveled between them."

He took a deep breath. "Pen, do you remember when I was suspended?"

"You mean when you tried to transfer out of the BAU? Of course I remember that, I credit myself with keeping you with us actually." She grinned.

He couldn't help but grin with her a little bit but it was only slight since this subject was so painful for him. "While I was home that week, I answered several calls where the person on the other end of the line didn't speak and then hung up."

"Several?" her brows furrowed.

"Yes. If it had just happened once I wouldn't have thought anything about it. But it had to have happened at least 6 times in 2 weeks."

"That's a lot," she agreed.

"The last one came on the day that I'd requested the transfer, the day you gave me the file for that case that I took Emily out to."

She looked at him intently waiting for him to continue.

"I was at home, looking at the file you gave me. I was using the coffee table, it was by the front door where Haley kept her purse."

She could tell that this was difficult for him so she remained silent.

"She was angry with me for looking at the file, very angry. While we were discussing it the phone rang. I had the cordless phone next to me so that I could call Morgan. I answered it, and no one was there. I said 'hello' a second time and the caller hung up."

Penelope leaned forward, her swollen tummy touching the table in front of her. She placed her hand on his arm.

"Almost as soon as the caller hung up, her cell phone rang in her purse. I stopped the conversation that she and I were having and waited for her to answer her phone. She let it ring and refused to answer it in front of me."

She gently squeezed his arm.

"Shortly after that I decided to fly out and help with the case. Haley was furious. When I got back she was gone. And shortly thereafter Jack began to mention 'Mommy's friend'." He couldn't look at her face at that moment, his head and eyes were lowered. _After all this time it still hurts so much._

He continued, "She supported and comforted me at the beginning of my BAU career, but it was short lived. Most of the time she just hated and resented my job. But it's what I felt that I needed to do, a sort of calling."

"Aaron, look at me." She waited for him to raise his eyes to hers. "I know that hurt you very deeply. I'd even bet that you've never shared that before with anyone." He nodded his agreement. "But that's not the way I work, I could never look myself in the mirror if I was cheating. I couldn't even cheat on that creep Kevin. And besides that, I admire you for what you do. I've heard the way that your voice softens when you're questioning a victim or consoling a victim's family. I happened to know that you've held more than one person's hand as they were dying. You are compassionate and caring, and you're doing a job that would drive most people in sane, and you do it because you care. I know that you miss birthdays and special celebrations all the time. But I also know that you try to make that up to the people you care about when you're home. And I hope you know that I would NEVER, EVER be upset or angry with you for going on a case and an inopportune moment. I get it, because I do it too."

He took both her hands and held them brushing his lips back and forth over both hands.

"I wish you'd just talked to me before this got so crazy."

"As do I," he sighed. "I can't even begin to explain to you how sorry I am for all of this."

"Aaron, can you just hold me?"

His response was immediate. He rose from the table and as she scooted her chair back, he took her hands as she rose from the chair. He leaned against the table and drew her close to him. She stood between his legs as he pressed her close, wrapping his arms around her back and pressing kisses to her forehead.

"Just so you know… I have never called myself 'Goddess Divine'." She was trying to lighten the mood after the heavy conversation.

"I know, but you have called yourself Goddess, and have said you were divine, I just put it together, seemed like it belonged." He kissed her forehead again. "You put your house in Jack's name…" it was a question really.

"Well, I figured if I tried to sell it, Derek or someone would have me tracked down. Besides, Jack needs a backyard."

"We've been staying there." She looked up at him. "Not all the time. Weekends. He's been really upset since I pushed you away and out. He's been angry." He turned his head and his eyes filled. "He put his _Salt & Pepper_ book in the commode."

"Oh poor Jack. I felt bad that I didn't' say goodbye when I left the apartment. But he was with Jessica, if I'd stayed to say goodbye to him I would have had to see you too, and it would have been too awkward. I just couldn't do that."

"I know." He raised his hands to her face, "Penny?" She looked up at him. "I love you so much, I have never loved any other person this much. Do you forgive me enough to live with me and Jack forever?"

Penelope's eyes were filled with tears and they spilled down her cheeks as she responded. "Aaron Hotchner, I love you more than you can even imagine. I think I have loved you for a long, long time and just never let myself think about it. But I know that spending the rest of my life with you and being a family is exactly what I want and never thought I'd have. Come help me pack." She grabbed his hand and led him through her small apartment.

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**Ok, you guys can breath easy again huh? lol. Sorry it was so angsty for a while. The story should be wrapping up soon. But we still have several chapters to go. **

**Btw, in cannon, I only saw Hotch get the one hang up call and then the ringing from Haley's purse. It was insinuated from the looks on both of their faces and the angle from the camera at her purse that she was starting an inappropriate relationship. But I did embellish it here by saying that there were several calls.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

Heading back toward the doctor's office to retrieve Hotch's SUV, "There's a lot to talk about Pen, but for starters… I think the best place for us is your house. I was trying to be optimistic about you coming back. I cleared out a room upstairs and bought some baby furniture…" He wasn't quite sure how to finish that sentence or train of thought. He just sort of let it hang there waiting for her response.

He ventured a look at her, her eyes were wide, she was trying to absorb what she had said. "Penny?"

She took one hand off the steering wheel and covered his hand slightly squeezing it. "I'm just trying to take it all in. For so long now I've been convinced that you didn't want me, and that this baby would be a very unwanted event in your life. It's hard to accept that you and Jack have been staying at the house much less you buying baby furniture. Jack wouldn't even let me hug him goodbye when I saw him last."

Again Hotch felt the sting of guilt for hurting not only himself and Penny, but Jack too. "It's my fault. He's been short tempered and reserved with people since you left. He's been angry even. I need a chance to talk to him now that I've found you… to smooth things over." He looked at Penelope apprehensively, "But I don't want us to be apart tonight."

"Aaron if you need tonight to prepare Jack it's ok, I won't bolt."

"NO!" He seriously looked terrified. "I really couldn't stand to be away from you. Please…" He covered her hand on his with his other free hand. "Just 30 minutes to an hour to talk to Jack. It's all I need Penny. Once he understands that this was all my fault… I am pretty sure he's going to be overjoyed to see you."

"Ok then, what's the plan?" She was pulling into the parking lot of the doctor's office.

"What if you picked up dinner while I explained things?"

Penny gave him one of her warm smiles. "Does he still flip over potstickers?"

Taking a deep breath, "Actually I haven't been able to get him to touch one in the last few months. However, I think if you brought his favorites, he'd eat them."

"Oooh that gives me an idea. Don't worry," she looked at him when he pinched his eyebrows together. "I think I know just what to do."

"Well at this point, I'd trust your instincts much better than I would my own. Oh!"

"What?! What is it?" her scrunched up face had him alarmed.

She grabbed his hand and placed it low on the left side of her belly. His eyes were wide as he felt the repetitive thumping on his hand.

"Oh my God!" he wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry.

"I think we might have the next Shirley Temple there." She laughed.

"Whoa! I don't know… that last one she really belted, she might be better than Jack on the soccer field." He looked up at Penelope's face. "Does she always kick so hard?"

She shook her head, "Unfortunately yes, and at the most inopportune times. She's a real night owl."

Placing both hands on either side of her face he leaned over and kissed her. His lips brushed hers softly and then he laid his forehead against hers. After a moment, he kissed both cheeks and then her nose and touched his forehead to hers again. "I'll never do anything to deliberately hurt you again Penny. I'll do everything I can to earn back your trust."

"Oh my sweet love, do you think I don't already know all of that? I have known you long enough to know that you don't have a mean bone in your body. But you will have to try to be open with me. You've got used to closing off your feelings. And for work I know you have to do that, but please, do not to do it with me. You can trust me too ya know. There's nothing you can really do to scare me away, the only thing that could make me leave is if you stop wanting me."

With that he pulled her into his embrace, not realizing how hard it was for her to maneuver her swollen tummy around in the car. "I swear… I will never stop wanting you Penelope. Never."

"Aaron, hey." She tried to get his attention

"Mmm?"

"Hey I'm not a pretzel, just let go a little bit, ok" she sighed, "that's better."

"I'm sorry," he smiled. "I want to kiss you," he whispered.

"You mean a real kiss?" she queried. He shook his nodded. "Well it's about damn time slick!"

He laughed, as much with a release of tension as with mirth. And then he kissed her, gently and yet firmly. He parted her lips and delved into her mouth with his tongue. _Oh God, she tastes so good. Mmm, feels so good. _Finally, he broke the kiss to come up for air.

She sighed audibly. "You certainly haven't lost your touch there Super Sexy Agent." She took another breath. "But that was really unfair ya know."

"Unfair?" _Did I take advantage? Oh God I hope I haven't messed things up._

"Oh yeah," she almost growled in a very low voice. "I'm a pregnant woman, with seriously raging hormones, and you kiss me like that right before exiting my car. We have nearly and hour's drive back and then I have to get lost for an hour…" _He's giggling. I totally have the serious ass SSA Hotchner in my car giggling like a kid._

Trying to quell his humorous release he gave her his vow, "I will make it up to you I promise." He pulled away then, "Pen, if we could spend tonight at my place, maybe a few nights. Over the weekend if you want, Jack and I can move some stuff out to your place."

"Jack's place," she corrected.

He smiled, "Jack's place. So I'll follow you back to town, and from the time we split, give me no more than an hour?"

"Sounds like a plan."

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**Sorry I know this is short but the next chapter will be really good I think. Plus, lol, we'll get to deal with the ooc of character with Hotch wearing the colorful shirt haha. I know its ooc, but maybe not so much. I see him as the type of person who'd do almost anything on personal time that would benefit his family.**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Hotch had been explaining to Jack for the last 25 minutes. "So you see Jack, it was my fault that Miss Penny didn't say goodbye, not hers. And it would make Daddy really happy if you could give her another chance."

"I don't understand, how come it's your fault?" Jack huffed and crossed his arms.

"Like I said Jack, I hurt her feelings really badly." They were sitting on the couch, and Hotch had his arm on the back of the couch behind Jack.

Looking up at his dad, "You really messed things up Dad. I was really mad at her. What if she don't like me no more now?"

"She does like you Jack, I already talked to her about it, and she missed you very much."

"Are you sure? Cuz, I think this just makes me look really bad."

Hotch tried to hide his smile. He knew this was serious to Jack but, the way his son was so worried about his own relationship with Penny, and the responsibility he was taking for his attitude toward her was quite comical considering that he hadn't played into the decline of their little family dynamic at all. "I promise you son, I am the one that looks bad in all of this, not you. Not you at all. Miss Penny is so excited to see you she's out picking up your favorite dinner now."

"Mac and cheese?" the boy asked.

"Well… no not that favorite dinner. She's picking up potstickers but don't tell her I told you ok?"

"Potstickers, for real?" he licked his lips, "When's she gonna get here?"

"Soon, really soon. Why don't we start straightening up a little bit while we wait?"

"Uhm, no thanks Dad." He was after all a kid.

"Jack?" Hotch said sternly.

"Alright," he replied as he began to pick up the video games that he had spread out on the coffee table.

Hotch went in to straighten the kitchen and by the time he had loaded the dishwasher he got a text message.

-How's it going there? Food is almost ready.

The number wasn't programmed into his phone he was so glad she'd texted.

-We're waiting for you.

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Penelope was finally smiling and happy again. Everything had shifted once again. Perhaps everything does happen for a reason. Her relationship with her stoic boss had happened so suddenly and intensely. Would they really have trusted it and made it solid if their feelings hadn't been tested? But now she knew, she could see and feel the depth of Aaron's feelings, his love.

She'd also had time to examine and know her own feelings, she loved him, wholeheartedly and without question. And for the first time, there were no regrets or negative feelings where this baby was concerned. She was free to be over the top with joy, only one thing concerned her, Jack. Hearing about Jack and his anger and unhappiness had broken her heart.

She'd made a stop on her way to pick up food, and with all the hope and optimism she could muster, she'd shopped and gone for Chinese. _Mmm, what to order, I want it all! _She laughed, outright attracting the attention of other customers. _Take me out for BBQ now Agent Hot stuff, I'll eat twice the amount of meat as you! _She smirked again.

The lady waiting to be seated in the restaurant looked at her in a snobby fashion. "What?" Penelope asked. "Aren't you ever just… Happy?" _Sheesh, some people._

She placed the order and then quickly texted Hotch.

When she got his reply she was so excited her legs danced as she sat in the lobby. _Come on, how long can it take? Isn't most of this stuff already made?_ She was so excited to get back to her men she didn't know what to do. After months of being on her own she was absolutely giddy at the thought of seeing Jack again. Not to mention being with his handsome father.

_Ohh, the aroma is driving me crazy! _She was longing for some of those mini eggrolls that were all meat, with the sweet and sour dipping sauce. Her mouth was watering. She was glad she'd ordered some extra to eat on the way but…. _Where the heck are they?_

"Here you are Ma'am." The restaurant host had a huge box full of bags and containers. "You must be having quite a party."

"Oh I sure am, quite a party." She agreed, failing to mention that it was a party of two adults and a small child.

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Penelope knew she'd need at least one of her bags and her laptop. But the box of food was the only thing she could manage at the moment without throwing herself off balance. She managed to get herself up to the apartment and rang the bell.

Hotch answered the door a moment later and was astounded by the amount of food she carried. "Pen, what did you do, order everything on the menu?" He took the box and bent to kiss her. He smiled humorously, "And did you already eat?"

"Uhm… no," she stammered, "I just had a little snack on the way." She looked around the living room and then back at Hotch. "Where's Jack? What did he say?" she had tried not to become anxious but it was difficult. She wanted so much to have that special connection again, but was worried after the cool reception she'd received from him the last few times she'd seen him.

"Well he understands that what happened was all my fault, but he thinks since his anger toward you was misplaced that you'll think less of him. He wants to see you, he really does but he's afraid that you won't be glad to see him." Hotch compressed his lips. It hurt that he'd hurt his son this way, and he hoped that Penny would be able to help him fix it.

"Is he in his room?"

"Let me check," he walked toward the kitchen and then stopped short of getting there. He looked back at Penelope.

Following his line of vision she could see Jack peeking around the corner from the kitchen. She knelt down. "Oh Jack." She began to tear up. "I have missed you so much. Please don't hide back there. Are you still so mad at me?"

Jack looked up at his dad.

"It's ok buddy, I know you love Miss Penny, I love her too. I won't mess things up again son, I promise."

That encouragement was all that Jack needed. He ran to Penelope and wrapped his arms around her neck. If she hadn't been on her knees, he'd have knocked her on her butt. "Oh Jack. I love you so much. I'm so sorry I didn't say goodbye. It's just you were in with your aunt when I left and I didn't know what to do." She had tears streaming down her face, Hotch was shedding a few tears himself.

"Hey," Jack jumped back. He looked at his dad. "You better get plates ready Daddy, I think Miss Penny is really hungry." His little face was so serious looking and had a touch of worry etched into his young features.

"What? Why do you say that?" his father asked.

"Well, her tummy looks like those starving kids on Sunday morning TV, and it just socked me when I hugged her."

Penny sat back on her bottom then and laughed. Hotch matched her laughter and Jack looked back and forth between them quite confused. "It's not funny Miss Penny."

"Jack, come here honey." Penelope beckoned.

Hotch walked over and guided his son back to Penelope, sitting on the floor next to her he took his son's hand. "Jack, come feel her tummy with your hand."

Jack screwed up his face, "Why?"

"Because Jack, I'm gonna have a baby, that's what you felt. The baby was moving and you felt either a hand or a foot moving around. Come feel, you'll see."

Jack offered his hand tentatively. Penelope placed it on her tummy where she felt the baby moving around. "Wow, that's a baby doing that? I didn't think babies where that strong."

"Believe me Jack, I didn't either." Penelope said.

Jack leaned over to his dad and whispered in his ear for a minute. Then he sat on his dad's lap and stared at Penelope.

She looked at Hotch questioningly.

Hotch took a deep breath, "He's afraid if you have your own baby, that you won't have time to spend with him." Hotch turned his son around to look at him. "Jack, I really want Miss Penny to live with us. Or us with her. The house might be better since it has more rooms. What do you think?"

"What about the dad? Where's he gonna be?"

Hotch took a deep breath. He really had let this happen wrong. "Jack. I am the dad."

"I know you're my dad. I mean the baby's dad."

"Jack, that's what I mean. I am the baby's dad too." Hotch felt really worried. It hadn't occurred to him that Jack wouldn't realize that Penny was having **his** baby.

Jack made a pained looking face.

Penelope was panicking. "What is it honey? You don't want to have a family?"

"Chad says his little brother drives him crazy taking his toys all the time and following him around." Jack pulled another face and looked at Hotch.

"Come here son," Hotch pulled his son into his lap and hugged him. "There's a couple of things about that. Number 1, Chad's brother is closer to his age than this baby will be. And being a big brother can actually be a really fun thing. You get to teach your younger sibling stuff, and its really cool because you'll have memories of what they were like when they were little. But the other thing is, this baby is a girl. She probably won't like your toys at all. But if for some reason she did, I hope you'd be a big enough man to show her how to share."

Jack pulled a face again and looked at Penelope, "Is she gonna get a ToonTown character with squooshy pants in the name?"

Hotch and Penelope laughed so hard that even Jack couldn't stay serious anymore. He didn't fully understand why the adults were laughing, but it felt good that they were so he joined in.

Finally quelling her laughter, Penny sat up. "Jack, if this baby is half as special as you are… I am gonna be the happiest woman in the whole wide world. In fact… I think I am already that happy. But guess what… you were right about something. I'M STARVING! Let's eat already, the food is getting cold."

Hotch jumped up and helped Penelope up from the floor. He then pulled out wine glasses and filled them with milk, in homage to the first dinner that they'd had together. Jack beamed when he got his glass and Penelope smiled her warm and affectionate smile at him. Following suit Hotch poured his own glass full of milk and then made a toast. "To our family," he toasted and held up his glass.

"To our family," Penelope repeated.

"To our family," Jack chimed in.

* * *

**So another fluffy and fun chapter. I hope you all are enjoying it now that Hotch and Garcia are reunited. :-)**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

"Pen? Where's the typical rabbit food? This is almost all meat." Hotch had started going through the containers looking for the garden low mien. He was laughing all the while at the amount of meat that she picked out when usually meat was minimal and veggie dishes were numerous.

Penelope wasn't sure what to say, she just gave a sorrowful look and shrugged.

"I take it your cravings don't consist of pickles and ice cream." He could at least be grateful for that!

"Eew, who craves that?" asked Jack, completely grossed out and sporting an expression to prove it.

"Well son, when women are pregnant, sometimes they want to eat strange things." Hotch explained.

"Miss Penny, do want to eat strange things? Cuz I heard that there are restaurants that serve people snails, that's strange."

"Uhg, Jack," Penelope's eyes half closed and one eye lid twitched up and down. "It's called escargot, and no I don't want to eat that. I just am enjoying meat a lot more than I ever have before."

"I'll say, did you get anything veggie?" Hotch asked as he smirked.

"Every dish has a little bit of veggies in it Sarcastic Smarty Agent." She gave him a look and then followed up with, "You're complaining?"

"No, not really," he laughed, "but I do miss the garden low mein."

"I'll keep that in mind for next time," she promised.

"So what else is my little girl causing you to crave?" he asked smiling.

_Just you wait and find out later stud!_ "That's pretty much it, I guess she's just a protein fiend. I even carry Slim Jims around in my purse. Oh and while we're on the subject… anytime you want to visit that BBQ joint again I'm all in!"

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They both tucked Jack in that night and when she produced the fruit of her pre-dinner shopping he was ecstatic. "How did you fix my book?"

"Oh Sweetie, I had to buy you a new copy. You're dad told me about the old one." Penelope explained.

Jack still gripping the book put his arms around her neck and squeezed his eyes tightly shut. "I missed you so much. I thought I was bad. But, I thought you were bad too, cuz grown ups are supposed to understand when we're bad, not just go away."

Hearing his words Penelope squeezed him tight in return. "Baby, you could never be bad enough to make me leave. Not ever. You know your dad invited me to be with you two forever, and that's exactly what I want if it's ok with you."

Jack drew back and looked at his dad, "Yeah, that's what we want alright. But," he hesitated, "when you have her," he pointed at her tummy, "are you gonna love her more?"

Hotch worried about how Jack went to all the negatives. He knew his own pessimism was rubbing off on his son.

"Oh my sweet Jack, are you kidding me?" she asked by way of an answer. "I will love her differently, but never more. Baby, you have the biggest heart and warmest smile I have ever seen except for your dad. And even if you weren't part of him, I would adore you just because you're you. But because you are part of him, just like this baby," she said pointing at her tummy, "you're even more special and precious to me. And Jack, you always will be no matter what. Ok?"

"Ok," he smiled. "Can you read my book now? And… do the voices please?"

"You betcha kiddo!" she smiled exuberantly.

Jack snuggled with his dad, propped up against the headboard as she read his favorite book, _Salt & Pepper_, once again.

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That night after Jack was asleep they talked. "What do you want to do about work?" he asked.

"Work? I left without notice, I kind of figured that was a done deal." As she looked at him a glimmer of optimism where her job was concerned sparked inside of her.

"I brought back Gideon after hiding him from the locals. When you disappeared I put you on requested personal leave. It's in the system I just haven't gotten around to filing the paper copy."

"Oh my God!" She through her arms around his neck. "If I didn't already love you I would totally love you now!"

"Well I can't tell you how much we are all going to love having you back on the team."

"What about us though? Will that eventually split up our team?" she questioned him.

"Well, the fraternization policy was implemented to protect the bureau from sexual harassment cases. If we were married, it would become a non-issue. I have spoken to Director Halloway. She's been monitoring Strauss, she's countered my previous suspension on my record, and if we were married… if it didn't impact our work performance, we could avoid either of us being transferred."

Garcia stood up in a huff. "I cannot believe this!"

Hotch was trying hard to catch up and coming up empty handed. "Pen what is it?"

"Aaron Hotchner if this is your idea of a proposal it just really sucks!" She stomped her foot. "I have never been a big fan of marriage but… Well I always thought that if I got proposed to, well that it would at least be more romantic than that. Uhhhg!"

"Penelope Garcia, that was not a proposal. I was merely stating the facts because I already know how you feel about marriage. I needed you to know where things stood if we wanted both of us to work with the team. If you prefer, I can always transfer out of the BAU."

"You would do that? I know that profiling is your niche."

"I would do that," he simply stated. He didn't love the idea, but if that's what it took, if it came to that…

Penelope crossed her arms and looked similar to Jack when he was digging his heals in over something. "Well, I want to think about it… And I want … I want to get a proposal. I'm not sure yet what I'll decide." She sat back down next to him then. "But you and I, the way this all took place… Well this unique t-shirt is the most romantic thing that's happened between us. You have soy sauce on it by the way, and I really wanted to save that beautiful thing, shadow box it maybe. Besides," she grinned, "as wonderful as the gesture was, and even though it helped to get you out of the dog house… it really doesn't suit you ya know. You better leave the bright color wearing to me." She couldn't help but giggle a little until he began pulling the t-shirt over his head to hand to her. She sucked in her breath then. After exhaling, her breaths seemed to come faster looking at his naked torso. "Anyway… I really just… want to… experience something… completely romantic." She completed her rant quite breathlessly.

"If it's romance you want my exotic beauty, it is romance you will get." _Dave, _he mentally spoke, _you better be able to help me out here or I'm dead! _"Now, in the morning, you've got to speak to the team. If I don't tell them ASAP that I've found you, you know they'll kill me."

"I know my love, but tonight… is just for us." With that she leaned over to kiss him and run her hands over his chest and back, which lead to other more pleasant activities.

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After an intense and enjoyable reunion they were laid in bed, Hotch spooned up against Penelope's back with a hand over her rounded tummy.

Once again his face was completely serious and a bit sad, "Pen, I don't even have words to express to you how sorry I am; sorry for hurting you and hurting Jack. I kept telling myself that I was trying to spare all of us, but in retrospect I was trying to protect myself only." He took a deep breath, "All I managed to do was experience hell on earth, and I know that it was one of my own making." He kissed her shoulder. "I can hardly believe that you forgive so easily, I know I don't deserve this, I don't deserve you. But having you here, both of you," he said rubbing her tummy, "I feel like my life is happy and complete. I haven't felt that way since Jack was born."

She already knew that. She'd been able to see weight of the world that he carried around on his shoulders. She wondered about women like Haley, how they could be so blind to men like Aaron. Why was it she couldn't see what she had in him and how the responsibility for his 'gift' in profiling was his burden to bear. She rolled over to face him, "I can forgive you because I love you and understand you Aaron. But make no mistake, I won't tolerate that kind of lack of communication again. I think what makes this so special between us is that we understand each other. We are very different you and me, but we have the same convictions where our work is concerned. I know what you see every day, and I know the responsibility that comes along with it. I'm going to understand and support you every time you get called away even when I don't like it. And more than that, I admire you for your concern and responsibility to your job. And I'm proud that a man as wonderful as you loves me."

He kissed her forehead, "Pen, you're more beautiful on the inside than you are on the outside. I'm not sure how I ever won a heart as pure as yours but I'm grateful." He kissed her again then. It was a slow soft and sensual kiss, and with it she felt the full impact of his love for her.

They made love again. And this time, after the confessions of their hearts, it was different than ever before. It was a slow exploration of each other and full of affection and admiration. This time they felt the blending of their souls as he filled her and their bodies found the perfect rhythm to convey their expressions of devotion. And when they reached their respective climaxes it was more than just an intense orgasm for either of them, it was a fulfillment of their souls.

Tears streamed from Penelope's eyes, "I didn't even know that it was possible to love someone this much."

Leaning over and kissing her, he replied, "Neither did I. " He put his arm up to rest on his forehead then. "I have no idea yet how I'm going to present this romantic proposal Penny, but I fully intend to make the offer in such a way that you can't refuse." He turned to look at her then, touching her cheek. "I know I've been divorced once, but I didn't want that divorce, Haley did. But with you, I have faith that you love and understand me in a way that she never did, and I feel confident that our commitment will last."

It was all Penelope could do not to tell him then that she'd spend the rest of her life being the most loving and supportive wife that she could, but after the last several weeks she was bound to hold out for that romantic proposal. And now she knew that he intended to make it a good one. After all, a girl deserves at least one fairytale moment in her life.

She merely responded with a chaste kiss and profession of love before she drifted into sleep with a light and happy heart.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

"Garcia!" Reid was the first one to see her as she stepped inside the bullpen the next morning. Running up to her and embracing her as though he hadn't seen her in a year. "I'm so glad you're back. I was so worried." He pulled back from the hug and looked at her. "You're smiling. " He gave her another quick hug and then looked back toward the others.

Emily was the next to respond. "PG," she said as she walked toward her friend. "Oh my God, I was afraid to go take my post without you coming back." Emily hugged her. Then at the puzzled look on Penelope's face, "I am supposed to be in England with Interpol, But I just couldn't leave until we knew you were ok. Oh… I'm so glad." She took Penelope's hand and then turned back toward Morgan and JJ.

Neither of them moved, so Penelope walked toward them. "Hey guys," she stopped in front of Morgan first. "Hey Baby Girl, where've you been?" He was angry at her for leaving and not saying anything to him. He wanted to let her know just how much, but his arms betrayed him and slipped around her drawing her to him. "I don't understand how you could leave like that and not tell me."

Pulling back she looked at his face. "Morgan, you know how it felt when you were arrested that time and we were all prying into your personal life? Even when you love the people around you a lot, it's sometimes hard to share the really personal stuff."

He sighed, "Alright Mamma, I'll give you that." He didn't like it but he did understand that concept of wanting to not have to share all.

Aaron stepped into the bullpen then and Rossi stepped out of his office and noticed what was going on.

"Pen, I would have wanted to be there for you if I'd known you were pregnant. I want to be there for you like you were for me and you didn't give me that chance." Finally JJ had spoken up.

"Perhaps we should move this to the conference room?" Hotch asked.

They all shook their heads and began moving in that direction.

When the door had closed behind them Penelope addressed the group. "I'm so sorry that I worried all of you. I had my reasons, and I think it's time that I shared them with you." She looked toward Hotch and everyone's gaze followed hers.

With all eyes upon him Hotch spoke up. "Garcia and I had become involved… personally I mean." He took a breath and continued. "After a couple of months, things went south. It was my fault, I wasn't quite as recovered from the experiences with Haley as I had thought. And Garcia in an effort to shield me from the wrath or discontent of all of you thought that she'd keep her pregnancy a secret and then eventually she just left. It wasn't because of her lack of trust or affection for any of you, in fact it was because of it that she left. She was sure, and I think rightly so, that if any of you felt that you needed to take a side that you would choose hers."

"So this is your kid?" Morgan asked loudly, pointing to Penelope's swollen tummy.

"Derek, Hotch nor I handled ourselves well in this, please don't put all your anger toward him."

"Well then who the hell do I direct it to?" Morgan was unable to deny that he felt betrayed and abandoned by his friend when her disappearance had caused them all to worry as they had.

"Derek, I didn't want to cause any of you worry, and the choice I made was to try to spare you all hurt and confusion. It was obviously the wrong decision. I hope you can forgive me, forgive us both. Try to remember that we're just fallible humans like the rest of you are." She took a step toward Hotch and took his hand in hers.

"You guys have worked it all out I see," Rossi said smiling.

"Oh yeah!" Penelope smiled, the brightest smile that any of the others had seen on her in longer than they could remember.

Rossi stepped forward to embrace her. "That's great kitten," he whispered in her ear. Then as he pulled back, "I'll just head back to my office now, I'll see you kids in a bit."

"I think I'll head back too," Reid said as he pointed his thumb back over his shoulder. "It's so great you're back Garcia. We'll talk later."

"Me too," Emily chimed in. "I need to start wrapping up my reports now and firm up my plans to relocate now that you're back." She stepped forward to hug her friend again. "It's so wonderful to have you back with us though PG. And don't worry; I'll be sure to come see the baby after it's born." After hugging Penelope she turned and left closing the door behind her.

"Why don't we sit down." Penelope said. "My feet get tired easily these days. And I think I paced back and forth outside for a good 30 minutes before coming inside the building." She wanted to let them know that hurting them was not something she took lightly. "I knew you would be the two that would be angry, because obviously it was the two of you that I would have hurt the most."

"I don't want to be mad at you Pen, it's just I feel so cut out of your life," JJ was doing her best to explain. "It just makes me feel like our friendship wasn't… isn't equal. Does that make sense?"

"Yes JJ, it does." Hotch admitted.

"Sweetie," Penelope began. "I think I would feel exactly the same if I were in your shoes. No … I know I would, but I can only explain it like this. I was determined to leave at the time and I decided not to tell you because number 1, I didn't' want to be a downer on you right after you'd married Will. And number 2, I didn't want to leave with you having negative feelings about Hotch. That kind of thing could affect your work and leave either of you vulnerable when you're in dangerous situations on the job. The decision I made may not have been the best one, but it was the best one I could think of at the time. It was not for one minute because I didn't want you with me at every step of the way in either my life or my pregnancy. And I can't tell you how happy I am to be back here with you, and I just pray that you can forgive me and be there with me through the next few months."

By the time that Penelope had finished speaking JJ had more tears in her eyes than Penelope did. "Of course I'll be there with you and for you." JJ got up from her seat and hugged her friend. But if you think that this is going to be the extent of your explanations then you have another thing coming." She sniffed. "You and I are due for some serious girl time and then you're going to get me up to speed on all of this properly." JJ then stood up straight. "Spa treatment, a whole day, you and me, soon… ok?" She was backing toward the door, knowing that Morgan would be the next to vent and wanting to give them all space to work it out.

"You got it girlfriend." Penelope answered and watched her friend walk out the door closing it behind her.

"Well?" Hotch looked at Morgan.

"Well what man?" Morgan ran a hand over his head to the back of his neck. "I'm just supposed to ignore the fact that we were all worried to death for the last few weeks and you obviously knew that the kid she was pregnant with was yours. You didn't say a damn word about it!" Morgan stood up then and the chair he was sitting in fell backward.

"I'm sorry about that Morgan, it's just…" Hotch tried to find the words.

"Just what?" Morgan huffed. "Just what Hotch?"

"Well quite frankly, I didn't have any faith that Penelope was going to forgive me. I was determined to find her however and restore her to her friends. The longer that I would have had to explain to you all what had happened… Well, I didn't want her to feel that I'd softened any of you up so that you were on my side instead of hers. I was prepared to incur your wrath and let her receive the comfort that all of you would offer."

"Oh honey, that's so sweet." Penelope touched Hotch's arm.

"Well what do you intend to do now? Now's she's back, what are you going to do?" Morgan questioned his superior.

"I intend to make us a family. A family that we want all of you to be part of."

"You think you're ready for that?" Morgan wasn't convinced considering what had gone down already.

"Yes Morgan I am ready for that." Hotch looked at him squarely and with complete resolve. "I've made mistakes in my life Morgan, but it's my intention from this point on to make this woman feel secure, content, happy, and fulfilled. You've got my word on that."

Morgan stared at him as if considering his words. He finally was persuaded enough to say, "Then you've got my support man." Morgan righted the chair that he'd turned over and walked over to Hotch, holding out his hand.

Hotch stood and shook Morgan's hand, "Thank you Morgan."

Penelope stood then as well and hugged her friend tightly. "I missed you so much Hot Stuff."

"Don't you ever run off like that again Baby Girl, you hear?" he looked down at her.

Looking back up at Morgan she answered. "I hear, I swear I'll never do that again."

Hotch smiled, he was relieved that Penelope was back in the bosom of all those that cared so much for her. Now all he had to worry about was how in the heck he could come up with a proposal that she couldn't say no to.

* * *

**Well my momentum has waned a bit. I have had a ton of projects to work on at home since my brother's wife is about to pop with another niece. I have load of things to do to help prepare for our new little angel's arrival. **

**I will try to post as quickly as possible but I only like 2 chapters written ahead now. If it takes me more than a day to post... please don't give up on me. **

**Tell me, now that the angst is over in the story, is it less interesting?**


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

It had been a mere two days since Penelope's return and the men were availing themselves of the weekend to assist the couple in preparing to move into the house.

"Pen, are you sure that pink and purple is the way to go here?" Hotch asked into the phone.

Morgan didn't wait to hear the answer, he just poured paint into roller pans.

"It isn't pink and purple, its blush and lavender," Penelope's voice could be heard through the phone's speaker. "I showed you the picture, do I need to come out there?"

"No. No, you do not need to come out here, the last thing you should be doing is inhaling paint fumes." Hotch sighed. "OK, let us get to work." And after they heard the disconnect sound, "I tried to talk her into a pale yellow." He shook his head.

"That's a colorful couple of girls you're gonna have on your hands there," Rossi smirked.

Aaron thought he should be irritated, but he felt so high on life at that point that he couldn't help but give into a half smile, half giggle (if that is possible for Hotch). "Believe me, I can live with it."

"So does Jack get new paint as well?" Reid asked as he prepared to do the trim work.

Hotch just turned around and glared at Reid.

Morgan and Rossi laughed out loud. Morgan sported a knowing smile and Rossi dared to ask, "Exactly what did our tech kitten promise young Jack?"

Hotch sighed, "He's considering camo in either grays, desert tans, or the traditional greens, and his other choice seems to be walls that are half black, trimmed in red, with web designs and an appearance or two of Spiderman. He has however graciously decided to wait until sometime after the baby is born so that he and Penny can do it together."

Reid hid his grin, Morgan wore his proudly as he got started on the bright and purely feminine color scheme. Rossi seemed to consider it but then shrugged wondering if all this was really so bad. Considering how warm and fun loving their mutual friend was, he figured Hotch was a pretty lucky guy all things considered. Besides, after the last few years of an almost never smiling Hotch, it was good to see his friend happy and optimistic for a change.

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As they were wrapping up after painting the room, they were discussing where to go for a drink. Hearing a horn honk they all looked out the window. Below was a convertible black Porche. A leggy brunette got out and leaned against the hood.

"Whoa," Morgan's eyes popped. "Rossi?" He looked over at the older Italian.

"She's not mine?" Rossi looked to Hotch.

Reid looked out the window, "Oh hey guys, I gotta go." He wiped his hands on a rag.

"Reid?" Morgan looked at the younger profiler in astonishment.

"What? Every woman doesn't go for brawn, some of them actually are attracted to a guy with high intelligence." Reid answered before heading out the door.

They all watched in awe as Reid exited the first floor door and greeted the beautiful brunette with a kiss before opening the driver side door for her, closing her in and then jumping into the passenger seat. As the couple drove off the other men looked at each other with raised eyebrows and chuckled.

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Hotch and Rossi sat at the table after Morgan got a call and left. "Ok Dave, you've been thinking about it all day, what do you think?"

"You know her much better than I do, how did you win her back anyway?" Rossi questioned.

"Uhg, don't ask."

Rossi let out a light chuckle, "Oh come on, after that you know you have to tell me."

Hotch related the story of the ad, leaving out of course the "Rainmaker" part. And then, the bit about the colorful T-shirt, had Rossi's eyes wide, and then he was laughing. While Hotch sat there with a mortified look on his face.

"I'm sorry, just the thought of you in rainbow colors is kind of too much, what did Garcia say about it?"

"She said it was the most romantic thing that had happened between us but that from now on I should leave the colorful stuff to her, it didn't suit me." Hotch sat back and took a swig from his beer.

Rossi did likewise, and after swallowing and contemplating this he answered. "Sounds to me like she isn't looking for something that's outlandish, just romantic. What's her favorite restaurant?"

"All she's talked about for the last few days since she's been back is BBQ. She's on an all meat diet right now." Hotch rolled his eyes.

"All meat? Are you sure it's the right Garcia you brought back?" Dave cleared his throat, "Well is there a second favorite restaurant?" Light seemed to dawn on Rossi and he asked "Do you even have a ring yet?"

"You know Dave, I'm not the most romantic guy in the world, but I do know a few things. We searched for her for weeks, of course I've gotten a ring by now."

"But you don't even know if she'll say yes?" Rossi was amazed.

"I want her to have it either way. It's an antique platinum and diamond ring. I think it suits her eclectic style." Hotch smiled. He knew Penelope had her own set of taste and style, but he wouldn't change anything about her, except for maybe the pink and purple walls they'd just finished in his future home. He grinned, _Even that is a small price to pay to have her back here._

"You're smiling." Rossi stated. "It's been a rare thing since I came back to the bureau. I think I have seen you smile more in the last couple of days than in all the time that I've known you. It's good."

Hotch smiled bigger, showing both dimples. "She's the most warm hearted, forgiving, loving person I have ever known Dave, I have every reason to smile, in spite of the hell we see in our job every day."

"So where's this BBQ joint she likes?"

"Woodbridge."

"Well, that's easy then." Dave stated.

"It is?"

"Yeah, you get some food to-go, pack a basket and take her on a picnic, a 'romantic' picnic to Leesylvania State Park. They have some great picnic spots there. The view is great. Finish up the day but lighting a lot of candles and say some really sappy stuff."

Hotch laughed. "That's not half bad Dave, and you'd be surprised at the sappy stuff that seems to spew out lately. Apparently I'm not as withered up and crusty as I'd thought."

"You know I'd have never paired the two of you up, but she's good for you. And she's clearly crazy about you. I have never seen a woman as full of adoration as her when she looks at you." Rossi chuckled. "You two surprised the hell out of me, but oddly enough, I think you were made for each other."

Hotch smiled again and stood to his feet. "And with that said, I'm going home Dave. I've been away from her way too long as it is."

Rossi stood up and clapped his friend on the shoulder. "Can't say as I blame you my friend. Let me know how it goes."

"I will."

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**Gosh sorry guys I missed my goal of posting every day. I know this chapter is short but I thought it was cute. Hope you think so too. **


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

As much as Hotch liked Dave's suggestion, he just couldn't quite picture Pen at this point in her pregnancy picnicking on the ground after a long walk. Besides, he wanted a grown up romantic evening to present his proposal, and they both enjoyed spending their days with Jack. In fact, Jack barely let her out of his sight.

On his way home he went by to check on a certain restaurant that he hadn't been at in years. He remembered that it had a fabulous view with a small lounge attached in which the entertainment was provided by a piano instead of a fancy sound system. He only needed to make sure that it hadn't changed hands and that nothing had changed.

After stopping in he was pleased to find out that the restaurant had changed hands but that the menu had improved, and the lounge entertainment was still a lone singer playing the piano and that she took requests. They were pretty much booked up for that night but he was able to make a reservation for the next night (Sundays weren't their busiest night of the week). He would have preferred not having to go to work the morning after their night out but he'd take what he could get.

When he got home he couldn't help but laugh. The music was blaring with "The Twist" and Jack was standing on the couch and holding Penny's hands while the two 'twisted' like crazy. He came up behind her and putting his hands on her stomach slowed her movements. "Easy Sweetheart, you're going to give our little girl whiplash with all that," he laughed.

"Oh exercise is good for her," she lowered her voice as she turned in his arms, "and aren't you glad about that!" She didn't ask that last part, she stated it.

He started to turn a darker shade and turned to Jack who was still standing on the sofa. "Have you been having fun buddy?" he asked loudly above the loud music. Then turning to Penny, "Since we can't move until next weekend now you'd better lower that volume Love."

Penny grabbed the remote and lowered the volume to extremely low, knowing that their dance session had ended.

"We had fun Daddy, Miss Penny said she gave us both silly pills."

"Well I don't think either of you ever need silly pills," he replied pulling each of them into an arm and slipping his arms far enough around them to tickle their sides. He was rewarded with giggles from both of them.

After they had all settled down Hotch inquired, "So did you have anything planned for this evening?"

"Well we prepared some food, it's in the refrigerator, why?" she looked questioningly at Jack who shrugged and looked at his dad. Then Penelope looked that way too.

"Well, on the way home I just happened to find a theatre that is still playing 'How to Train Your Dragon'." Hotch answered. "And… it happens to be right next to a restaurant that Uncle Dave says is good."

"Cool! Do they make sgabetti and meatballs?" Jack asked.

Penelope giggled but she wasn't about to touch that one. She simply remarked with, "Well if I'm lucky they serve meatballs with a bit of spaghetti."

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As they walked away from the movie, Jack was between his father and Miss Penny holding each of their hands and swinging occasionally.

"Jack, I'd like you to spend tomorrow night with your Aunt Jessica. It's time I took Miss Penny out on a date. Would that be ok with you?"

"Sure Dad, I love staying over with Aunt Jess. But I dunno if you should take Aunt Penny dancing at all, I kinda wore her out today."

Hotch laughed, "Ok Buddy, I'll keep that in mind." He winked at Garcia. "That ok with you Pen? And before you say anything, they have thick cut prime rib, a 16 oz ribeye, and filet mignon on the menu as well as roasted chicken and an assortment of baked fresh fish."

"A date huh?" Penelope beamed, "like I'd say no." A petrified look crossed her face then, "I don't have anything nice though. Not since she started making herself known." She was looking down.

"Oh and we know how you hate to shop." Hotch rolled his eyes.

"I …" she had begun excitedly but then stopped and looked at Hotch, "I want to ask JJ to go shopping with me. Do you think it would be ok, do you think she's ready? Maybe help heal things up between us?"

"I'm sure she'd love to go. You might think about asking Emily too, she's got less than a week left, Strauss has already given me a list of perspective replacements."

"OK." Her smile radiated.

Jack was not unaware that his dad was planning something special, he looked up at Hotch and winked, and Hotch quickly winked back before Penelope saw.

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM 

"Come on you guys, help me out here, I want to be dazzling. I mean as much as that is possible in my current state."

"Well what sort of things does he compliment you on PG?" Emily asked.

"Oh wouldn't you like to know my sweet?" Garcia wiggled her eyebrows.

Emily tilted her head to the side as if to say 'Really?'

"Ok, ok. He loves it when I wear my light pink shimmery lipstick. He says that the soft look matches my soft-heartedness." But while she was speaking JJ and Emily were looking at each other and laughing at the prior comment.

"Ok, so he likes you in pink. I saw something over in that corner over there," JJ said.

Ten minutes later Penelope was stepping out of the dressing room in the loveliest maternity dress she could imagine. Sure, it lacked her usual bright splash, but it also made her feel like a princess. It was sleeveless so she'd have to wear a cardigan but she had one of those that would match this perfectly. The dress had a square neckline that was trimmed in wide pink satin. The rest of the material was a thin poly with identical pale pink but pleated. It gathered just under her full breasts and had a longer front hem so that with her full tummy the hem swirled perfectly with the back at knee length.

"Well?" she asked nervously of her friends.

"Oh Pen, if he weren't already in love with you… You in that dress would definitely steel his heart."

Garcia then looked at Emily.

"Definitely. I mean, you took my breath away. You're gonna knock his socks off I'm sure." Emily hadn't been joking. After seeing a glum Garcia for about a year, and now see her pregnant and ecstatically happy, and twirling in the beautiful pink dress, it had taken her breath away. Emily finally felt a peace about leaving that she hadn't known until then.

"Shoes!" JJ announced.

"Oh you're right," Penelope said. "Not that I don't have shoes that would match, but they have two and a half inch heels, I can't wear them."

A block down the street they were able to find a shop that had white ballet type slippers with pearl and rhinestone accents and they were purchased. "Ok my sweets, thank you so much for helping me. But I need to get home now and do something with my hair before tonight. Wish me luck."

Emily looked at JJ in shock and JJ looked back at Emily with determination.

JJ piped up first. "Oh I think NOT! We are coming with you! We are going to be there while you fix your hair and get ready for this knock out date. Sorry Garcie, but you are NOT ditching us at this point in the game. Besides, I picked you up remember? You can't go anywhere without me."

Penelope almost blurted out that she intended to take a cab but then thought better of it. Her friends wanted to be there for her and she would let them. This was the re-bonding time that they all needed. And besides, after month of not confiding or sharing anything with her friends, she needed this as well.

* * *

**Sorry I know its been a while, but I took an unplanned trip (in the rain). Wow and car top carrier leaked, reached my destination with ruined clothes lol. I've been having a crazy, busy time. I didn't even take time to proof this before posting it to you. Hope you all enjoy it, still just a build up to the big proposal scene with I only hope I can do justice to. **

**Let me know what you think :-)**


	26. Chapter 26

**I'm sure you all thought I had forgotten about this story. I hadn't, but I had charged up the proposal to be something so good that I got writer's block. Then I was at the hospital yesterday waiting for a family member to have a procedure done. I was reading the new Hotch/Garcia story called "In the Garden" (which is a must read I think for all Hotch/Garcia shippers). Anyway, this just started coming together for me. So... hope you all enjoy it.**

Chapter 26

When Hotch saw the girls entering the apartment with their purchases he decided to make himself scarce. Being around while JJ and Emily fussed around Penelope wasn't a fun prospect. He got Jack packed up and then headed to Jessica's. He hadn't had the serious conversation with Jessica yet about his change in family status and figured now would be a good time before he was springing it on her after the fact.

When he arrived with Jack however, he felt a bit apprehensive about telling her but he wasn't one to put off what needed doing simply because it was unpleasant or uncomfortable. He found however that she was more accepting of the idea than he had imagined she would be. She liked Penelope a lot, and knew that they would still include her in their lives and more importantly in Jack's. He actually found himself smiling when Jessica inquired of she might be "Aunt Jess" to the new baby as well so that both siblings would feel equal status. Hotch had quite an affection for his sister-in-law and warmed to that idea right away.

Meanwhile, back at the apartment the girls were giving Penelope the full treatment. After she'd showered, they had insisted that she put her feet up while one blow dried her hair and the other painted her nails. Emily was great at French manicures, and JJ was sweeping part of Pen's hair up while leaving the rest cascading around her shoulders. A few pearl hair adornments were added and after a stab at putting in her contacts, Penelope finally opted for her light gold glasses with the rhinestones on the sides. She grabbed her light cardigan to wear when the evening got cool and she was ready to go.

She'd had a lovely time with her friends fussing over her. She was sad that Emily was about to leave, but thankful that she'd have JJ with her throughout the remainder of her pregnancy. And as they left she hugged them each fiercely. It was so good to be home and she was looking forward to her date with Hotch immensely.

She kicked back on the sofa while she waited for him. She was tired already and her feet had a tendency to swell now. A short rest while she waited for her handsome love to return was just the ticket. She was sleeping so deeply that she didn't hear his key in the door and had forgotten to set the alarm after the girls had left.

Hotch opened the door and saw Penelope sleeping. And far from the cold clutches that had gripped his heart in the last few months, he felt a flutter in his chest and a warmth that he couldn't explain. She was breathtakingly beautiful! She was his, and she was here with him, he couldn't remember being happier than he was in this moment.

Closing the door quietly he walked to the sofa and knelt beside it and gently brushed his lips over the Penelope's perfectly soft, pink shimmery lips. Her eyes fluttered and as Hotch pulled back they opened.

"Hey, you're back," she said softly.

Hotch sat back on his haunches a bit, "It worked; you woke just like Sleeping Beauty." He smiled. "And you're every bit as beautiful as a princess in a fairy tale."

Penelope beamed at the compliment. "What time is it?" She sat up.

Hotch looked at his watch, "A few minutes after 5, our dinner reservations aren't until 6:30. We could go for a walk before dinner if you aren't wearing any of those crazy shoes."

Penelope tipped her head in a look of disdain. "I've learned to be a lot more practical until this girl is born, see?" she pointed at her shoes.

Hotch smiled, "Very good, you'll fit perfectly under my arm as we walk then."

She couldn't help but poke his ribs since he was looking so damn smug. "You know of course that you have a bit of a chauvinistic side to you."

"I choose to see it as a chivalrous side."

"The Goddess will grant you that since you've been so complimentary this evening." She began to turn away from him to get her sweater.

Hotch couldn't help himself, when she began her banter it was a complete turn on. He spun her back toward himself and kissed her in earnest.

When he finally released her she was breathless. "Great, now I'll have to redo my lipstick."

"Oh Goddess Divine, I caution you to bring that particular cosmetic item with you." Hotch wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Penelope smiled. "I think I am going to enjoy this date immensely."

"That's the plan Beautiful."

Penelope looked into his eyes, seeing his admiration. "Being with you, somehow I actually feel as though I am beautiful, and part of something beautiful."

Hotch hugged her close, "Pen, I wonder if you can begin to know how happy I am at this moment, being here with you."

Penelope could feel the evidence of his arousal, and hear the raw emotion in his voice. "Whoa there cowboy, I can match you ounce for ounce with every bit of love and passion you're feeling. But this is supposed to be a date remember? Dinner reservations and everything."

"Believe me, I am not going to miss this opportunity to wine and dine you my lovely Penelope."

Twenty minutes later found them walking through the park near the restaurant. True to his word, Hotch had her tucked under his arm as they walked and she had and arm around his waist.

As the baby beat a rhythm on his side he inquired, "I wonder if she thinks I'm too close to you, or if she just wants me to know she's there, or if she's truly trying to dazzle me with her fancy footsteps?" Anyone who knew him a year ago wouldn't believe this was Hotch. He actually giggled as he asked the question (such a far cry from his well known, stoic and serious persona).

"Oh I'd say if she's anything at all like her Momma, she's wants to dazzle you," Penelope replied.

"Then I'll consider myself dazzled by you both."

Penelope smiled up at him and saw the smile on his face as well. "You know, I have to keep pinching myself. I have never been so happy, and just a week ago I was trying desperately to be satisfied with knowing I would probably never know true happiness again. It seems so surreal to be back here with you and Jack, and you wanting this baby and wanting to be with me always."

They stopped walking and Hotch turned to her. "I'm glad you're happy Pen. I am as well. I don't think I have EVER been so happy. But this isn't a fairy tale. I am not perfect as you well know. I know about your 'scale'," and when she looked confused he clarified, "your 'goodness scale' that you rate people on. I came to know before any of this ever happened between us. But I soon realized that you'd rated me on it." He took a deep breath. "I am flattered and also honored that you rated me so high on it. Although I think I might have fallen on your scale after the last few months. But I just don't want to be on some pedestal that I have to worry about falling off of. Living with someone is fulfilling and wonderful, but it can also be challenging, and I have it on good authority that I'm difficult to live with."

"Oh my darling, you're right. I do rate you high on my scale. But you are exactly where you belong on my scale. I do not think you are perfect. I'm sure you don't think I am either. But I do think you are good. I think you try to do things for the right reasons." She reached up and touched his face. "Aaron I know we will have difficult times, times where we disagree, we are very different people. But your biggest challenge with Haley was your job, and as I have said before, that will not be an issue between you and me. You have a strong sense of responsibility and priorities and I am confident that if there is a time to put the job aside to tend to your family, you'll make the right decision."

Hotch raised her hands to his lips and kissed them, then bent down and kissed her lips. "I love you Penelope. And I think it's time for dinner," he grinned.

They entered the restaurant, and were led to their table. Penelope was enamored of the view. "This is lovely; I have never been here before."

"I haven't been here in a quite a while. The management is new, and they have been very accommodating."

"Accommodating? What do you mean?" she asked. But just then an ice bucket was brought to their table containing a chilled bottle of sparkling juice along with two glasses.

Hotch only grinned.

"Oh I see."

Dinner passed with a wealth of smiles, laughter, and happy conversation.

As they moved from the restaurant to the adjacent connecting lounge Aaron casually tapped his breast pocket with his wrist. The ring was still there. His idea for this had come to him last minute and he was fully prepared to wait a week or two to make it happen, but his old friend had been so excited that he was finally ready to take the plunge again that he'd flown in that day.

Aaron smiled confidently; he knew that he'd nailed the perfect romantic proposal for Penelope. If she refused, it would simply be because she couldn't resign herself to "marriage." If that were the case, he'd be disappointed of course but he'd give her the ring anyway and he'd settle for her being with him forever. At least in that he was confident. He now realized that she was in this for forever.

As they entered the lounge, the sultry voice of the singer drifted around the room. It was a bit louder than the hushed tones of soft conversation happening among the couples at tables while it accompanied by the piano serenaded the couples dancing on the floor. The view from this room was also stunning and Penelope was excited as Aaron led her to the table marked reserved, which had the best view of all.

"Oh Aaron, this is beautiful. Oh I love it here."

He held her chair out for her and she lowered herself into the chair slowly. Then leaning down he whispered in her ear. "I hope you'll dance with me later. Jack said you'd be too worn out from yesterday."

"Mmm, I can't wait to dance with you." The unmistakable sound of desire in her voice caused a shiver to down his spine and radiated desire within him which caused him to scurry into his own chair rather hurriedly.

"Penelope," he couldn't help but laugh at himself a bit breathlessly.

"Causing you difficulties Lover?" she grinned evilly.

Hotch just shook his head. "I didn't even have to fight this hard for control even as a teenager."

"I think that's a wise idea. What did you have in mind?"

"How about baby names?"

Oh boy, he could just imagine the type of name that the free-spirited love of his life might suggest. "Ok, I suppose you already have something in mind." He made a real effort not to sound disparaging.

"Well I have a list…" she pulled a slip of paper from the unusually small purse she had brought with her.

With quick and precise movements he leaned up and snatched the list to peruse it for himself. "Eudora? Fedora? Penelope, she's going to go to school with her name."

Penelope scrunched up her face, "Ok, you're right. Something more practical then. Ooh, why does that word leave such an awful taste in my mouth?"

Hotch couldn't help but laugh. "Let me try something." He pulled his phone from his pocket and looked for girl names that meant 'treasure.'

"What are you doing?"

"Looking for names that mean 'treasure'."

"Let me see." With the same swiftness with which he'd acquired her list she raised up out of her chair and grabbed his phone.

"Oh! I love the name Cherish."

"It's pretty Pen, but if that were her name boys would call her Cherry." He tilted his head so that she'd get his meaning.

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that." She seemed to mull it over. "Well what if it were her middle name?"

He thought about it for a minute. "I think that would probably be ok."

"Great!" she looked as if she'd just scored a huge victory and he couldn't help but laugh.

He was beginning to get a little nervous and looked around for any sign that his plan was coming together. He didn't see anything though other than the singer/piano player looking around. But when she began to play 'When You Say Nothing At All' he thought at least he could have one dance with Penelope now. "Would the most beautiful woman here care to dance with me?"

"Indeed she would my sweet prince." Penelope rose from her chair to take his outstretched hand.

It was an enchanting feeling for Penelope to be in his arms and to be gently guided around the dance floor. Likewise for Hotch, to have this most incredible woman back with him, loving him, and in his arms on this special night was nothing short of miraculous.

As the song ended he thought to make his way back to their table when he saw his friend step up toward the house singer. With immediate acknowledgment of what was going to happen, she made the announcement. "Ladies and Gentlemen, for a very special occasion we have a special guest with us tonight, Mr. John Berry."

Being unfamiliar with Berry's particular brand of music Penelope was only vaguely aware of his celebrity status but clapped along with the other in the classy and quiet lounge. As she looked at Aaron, he only smiled brightly at the man who had just been introduced.

Penelope's eyes drifted back to the celebrity as he sat on a stool, grabbed his guitar and adjusted a mic on a stand. "Thank you very much for allowing to steal the stage here tonight briefly. I'm here in honor of a very old and dear friend of mine who wants to present the lovely Penelope with a very romantic evening on a very special occasion."

The surprise on Penelope's face was comical as Aaron whisked her back into his arms and began to guide her slowly around the dance floor again.

With gentle strumming of the guitar the man began to play and sing the song, 'Will You Marry Me.'

_I think I've waited long enough,  
Let enough time go by,_

Hotch pulled away so that he could look at Penelope's face. Recognition of the song and who the singer was set in and he could see the emotion in her eyes. With eyes locked they continued to dance as Berry sang:

_To know just what I need in my life.  
When I look at you right now,  
My heart is telling me why,  
You're the only one for me.  
An' tonight, if you let me ask you this,  
With Heaven as my witness:_

_Will you marry me?  
I wanna be with you for all eternity.  
I swear my love for you will always be.  
Here, on bended knee,  
Baby, I'm asking, please,  
Will you marry me?_

At that point, Hotch dropped to one knee and pulled the antique ring from his pocket. He looked up into the watery eyes of the most beautiful woman he'd ever known. But saying nothing they just stayed there and listened to the rest of the song.

_All that I see in your eyes,  
Let me save deep inside,  
'Cause I don't wanna lose one moment of you.  
Lookin' like the picture in my dreams,  
One that I see comin' true.  
'Cause you're dreamin' the same dream I do.  
Please let me ask you this,  
All of Heaven as my witness:_

_Will you marry me?  
I wanna be with you for all eternity.  
I swear my love for you will always be.  
Here, on bended knee,  
Baby, I'm asking, please,  
Will you marry me?_

_You're the only thing I've ever been this sure of.  
More than anything I've ever wanted before._

_Will you marry me?  
I wanna be with you for all eternity.  
I swear my love for you will always be.  
Here, on bended knee,  
Baby, I'm asking, please,  
Will you marry me?  
Will you marry me?_

_Oh.  
Will you marry me?_

Penelope watched as the most incredible man she'd ever known pushed the ring on to her finger and the tears spilled down her cheeks.

"Well?" he asked, still kneeling on the floor and holding her hand.

"Will you just stand up and hug me?" she got out with a voice choked with tears.

As he stood and pulled her into his arms he whispered a husky "I love you," into her hair near her ear.

And lowly, so that only he could hear she choked out, "Yes Aaron, I'll marry you."

He squeezed her then as tightly as he dared. "I think our daughter's excited," he laughed. "The cheer she just gave might actually bruise you, or me," he laughed again.

Then they turned as they heard over the sound system, "Aaron, do I take it she said yes?"

Hotch called out, "Yes, she said yes!" The room erupted in applause.

And beginning to strum again, Berry began to sing, 'Your Love Amazes Me.'

"You are a very surprising man Aaron Hotchner. I had no idea that you liked country music."

"I don't normally," he confessed, "but John is a friend of mine and I remember him telling me once how these particular songs were favored by couples for proposals. I remembered that yesterday and called him. He was so happy that he jumped a plane this morning."

Penelope was beginning to tire but she was loath to give up dancing to this song, which she knew was also being sung for her. So she just leaned in, finding the most comfortable stance as she could given the rounded belly that separated them.

Finally the last remnants of the song began to drift passed their ears:

_You give me something to believe in  
Forever faithfully  
Your love amazes me_

Your love  
But only you could save me  
Your love amazes me

"Thank you folks, for letting me trespass on your evening so that I could be part of my friend's celebration here." And John Berry raised his hand toward the audience who all seemed to be sitting as they clapped, except for Hotch and Penelope.

They made their way toward the singer, and Hotch put out his hand, which was quickly grabbed by Berry. "Thank you John, thank you for making this evening so special."

"Hey, I'm just glad to see you finding some happiness again. I'm glad I could be here."

"Come sit down with us for a minute wont you?"

"Sure, but only for a few minutes, I'm headed back home tonight."

They all sat at the table. Penelope was glad to get off her feet for a bit. "So how do you boys know each other?"

"Well Aaron here was running in a charity event some years back and it was one of my pet charities."

"John seemed to find FBI work interesting."

"Yeah it's interesting alright, but couldn't do it, wouldn't even want to. How bout you two? How'd you meet?"

Penelope grinned evilly as Hotch casually replied, "We work together."

Reaching across the table to take her lover's hand, "Yes, Aaron's my boss."

This caused Berry to raise his eyebrows. He leaned back in his chair crossing his arms and looking at Hotch.

Hotch's mouth was agape. "Penelope…" he said in exasperation. Then looking at his friend and returned to his stoic work mask, "I have never used my position to garner anything personal from any of my team."

Penelope, seeing his staunch defense and the oh so serious look on his face, instantly regretted teasing him. "That's true, very true. Aaron I was just teasing."

Berry continued to look very serious, and Hotch now turned his icy stare on Penelope. Following Hotch's lead Berry also turned to look at Penelope very seriously.

Penelope felt the insane impulse to squirm when both men suddenly burst into laughter. "Uhg, don't do that!" she wadded up her beverage napkin and threw it at Hotch.

"Well I need to be going. I'm booked for charity events and performances for the next few months… but maybe after you tie the knot and bring that little on into the world you can take a few days and pop down for a visit. Oh and just for the record, Aaron no more bar gigs."

Aaron laughed, knowing the man's strong faith and convictions. "Duly noted. But thank you. I don't even think I could thank enough for being here."

Berry then turned to Penelope, "It was lovely to meet you Penelope." Then taking her hand and holding it in both of his as he stood. "I'm so glad you said yes." He released her hand and left.

"So did you really think all this up yourself?" She looked at him skeptically.

"I did, I pressed Dave, but he suggested taking you on a picnic and sitting on the ground."

Penelope just stared at him blankly, "And he's been married 3 times?" to which they both began to laugh.

"So anything else you'd like to do tonight?" he asked.

"Absolutely," she answered.

Not knowing what else he could possibly add to this evening he looked at her questioningly ready to give her the moon if she asked for it.

"I want to go home and make love to my very romantic fiancé."

Hotch raised one eyebrow, "Well what are we waiting for?"


End file.
